Can An Empath Really Feel Other People’s Emotions?

The answer to the above question is yes. An Empath really can feel the emotions of others.

The problem is we don’t always know how it makes us react.

What I mean by this is, the emotional energy of those we come into contact with can have a huge impact; not only on how we feel but on how we behave. It can push us towards being more introverted than what is natural, it can trigger insecurities or even make us feel unwell.

How Does an Empath Know How to Interpret Emotional Energy?

Interpreting emotional energy is a tricky area. We can so easily misconstrue what we feel. I know I certainly have with different people over the years.

In my teen years I had a friend who, for the purpose of this post, I will call Sarah. I met Sarah at high school. She came from a broken home. But nothing in her outward persona gave off insecurities about her parents’ divorce. She was a bright vivacious girl. Sarah was popular, good at sport and academically minded. And although she did not seem affected by the breakdown of her parents’ marriage, the way she felt to me told another story (I just didn’t know it at the time).

I didn’t know Sarah when her parents split, so I cannot attest to how she was prior to the breakup. But, whenever I was with her, I felt insecure and unstable. At the time I assumed it was ‘just me’ and my own teenage insecurities that made me feel awful when in her presence.

I continued to hang out with Sarah, along with my other friends, after school and into my late teens. But I never enjoyed spending time alone with her. In fact, she used to comment on how quiet I was when it was just the two of us. But I couldn’t help it, I felt myself freeze up when with her.

In her late teens, Sarah ended up getting into the ‘rave/drug scene,’ which was so popular in the late eighties and early nighties here in Manchester. From there she very quickly went downhill. Her childhood trauma evidently caught up with her, which was quickly heightened by her drug use. I would get early morning phone calls off her, telling me that she was frightened and needed to talk immediately. When I turned up at her home, she would not acknowledge the phone call or admit there being a problem. If I tried to talk to her about it, she would quickly change the subject.

Because of her lifestyle choice, Sarah drifted from me and my group of friends. Within a couple of years, Sarah’s mind was no longer her own. She became mentally unstable and was in and out of mental health units.

I lost touch with Sarah many years ago. I have heard through the grapevine that she is still a troubled soul and a shadow of her former ‘happy-go-lucky’ teenage self.

At the time, I may not have understood what I felt in Sarah, but I can still remember how it impacted me. She may have hidden from her pain, but it was loud and clear for me to feel. It gave me a sense of feeling insecure and awkward.

Hidden Pain

Another example of my sensing hidden pain which I didn’t understand in another is with someone who I will refer to as Mrs Smith. I was probably in my twenties, with no real understanding of my Empath ways, when I first encountered Mrs Smith. I remember feeling particularly uncomfortable with her, but in a different way than I had felt with Sarah. The memory of which has also stayed with me for many years.

I have attended the same gym, on and off, since my twenties. It is the type of gym, like many others, where you know people’s faces but don’t know their names or their backstories, and it was here where I first encountered Mrs Smith, when we were paired up in a yoga class:

The best way I could describe Mrs Smith’s energy, on my first encounter with her, was as a self-absorbed vibe. I wasn’t sure why but I did not enjoy being in her presence. I remember back then that she was sometimes arrogant and acted like she was the only person in the room worthy of the teacher’s attention. I felt naturally repelled by her. Over the years, as I came and went from the gym, our paths rarely crossed, until I started doing classes regularly again.

On my first re-encounter, I remember being stood in the studio, waiting for the class to start, when Mrs Smith came behind me. I immediately reacted. All I can say is I felt rage inside. I wanted to get away from her because the feelings I experienced were so unbearable (which also made me feel guilt for wanting to escape her). I didn’t remember feeling ‘this bad’ with her before.

The thing is, Mrs Smith looked happy. She chatted to others in the class and made her presence known. From the outside you would never think anything untoward was going on. But every time I came close to her, if only in passing, I was engulfed with a sense of dread or rage. By this point I knew I was an Empath and I recognised that I was feeling her energy. It was so potent that it was hard for me to block it or distract myself.

I didn’t even have to see Mrs Smith to feel her energy, it would wash over me like a dark gloom, even when she was out of eyeline.

When I don’t know them personally, I sometimes find that by making eye contact with people, who trigger emotional reactions within me, it has the effect of lessening the impact. But as Mrs Smith never looked my way, often breezing by me like I was invisible(this is common when those in pain come near an Empath see this post to learn more), all I could do was quietly inch myself away.

Sadly, a couple of years ago, Mrs Smith committed suicide.

Everyone who knew Mrs Smith at the gym were shocked by how she could do such a thing. They had no idea that she was in such a dark place. But facts emerged about her life after her passing, that she had not shared with others, which explained her story. It also explained why I felt such rage in her presence. It was a very sad ending to a life of pain.

When an Image Does Not Reflect the Truth

I could go on with examples of how people have affected me emotionally, and how an ‘image’ does not always reflect the truth. A smile can hide deep pain. Arrogance can hide an incredible lack of self-worth.

Humans are good at concealing insecurities and their inner turmoil, but an Empath will always feel them.

When engulfed by negative emotions, after being around a certain person, it doesn’t mean the other is a bad person. We are often just picking up on what the person feels about themselves or about life.

Is there a Solution?

So, the question is what we should do when we feel toxic emotions in another. Should we intervene or avoid?

When people hide from themselves, or are in denial of their past, there is not a lot we can do to help them. If they are not ready or willing to confront their insecurities or ‘shadow,’ they will unlikely want others to acknowledge them either.

A Few Kind Words

Self-protection is important. Sometimes staying away from those who trigger uncomfortable feelings is the best and only option. However, there are ways we can make a difference to those in hidden emotional pain, without doing too much damage to our own emotional health, by offering a few kind words.

Words of self-encouragement or just simple friendliness can go a long way. Not only in changing the way the other feels to us, but also in how they feel about themselves (if only briefly).

We can be inclined to avoid those who make us feel bad, but sometimes briefly making contact actually helps them and us. It can have the effect of ‘breaking the emotional connection,’ and distracts us from what we feel.

Some might find it better to mentally send ‘positive vibes’ instead. It really depends on how the energy of another affects you and your mind.

Of course, this is a broad subject with many different scenarios. But it is always good to have different approaches to survive in different situations.

Please feel free to share examples of how you cope when around people who carry ‘uncomfortable energy’ in the comments below.

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time…

Diane.

©Diane Kathrine

What is Really Making You Angry?

Have you found yourself suffering more with angry emotional reactions lately than what is usual? Have you ever wondered why?

Following on from my last post about the shadow side, today I want to discuss another way in which the shadow may be experienced: through anger.

The reason this is an important issue to address is because anger is especially damaging to the body. Anger stresses the adrenals, causes stomach problems, and weakens the heart area. in fact, just one minute of anger can suppress the immune system for five hours.

In current times it seems anger is being purposely stimulated amongst the masses, which is not good for the Empaths.

All around the world we see people getting angry or hateful over ‘local or global affairs.’ There is so much fury being projected on to issues presented online that it makes you question: are people really so angry with these issues or is it something else? Something deeper that has been suppressed that is trying to draw their attention?

An Empath will always be affected by the anger in others; but they also have their own to deal with. However, because they know the damage anger can do, when projected on to others, it is often suppressed. Which rarely leads to anything good.

You’re Never Angry About What You Think You’re Angry About!

The above statement is so true. We are rarely infuriated by what we think. We are simply projecting our pain when triggered.

When we project our pain on to external factors, instead of looking inwards to find and fix what needs fixing, we don’t uncover the real roots of our anger.

How Do We Uncover What is Really Making Us Angry?

An unhealed Empath, who has spent years stuffing down emotions, can find offence in pretty much everything. In these times, however, everything is rising to the surface. As noted many times in other posts, imbalances in hormones, due to the diet and environmental factors, plays a huge part in emotional reactions (read more here), but they mostly have to do with our past.

Going Backwards to go Forwards

In life we often have to go backwards to go forwards. What I mean by this is we have to visit the origins of the wounds from our past before we can move away from them.

If, for example, anger is triggered in the present by someone expressing their beliefs, the question has to be asked: Why are their opinions striking a chord?

Could it be related to a buried memory from childhood? Maybe a memory of being told you were wrong? Or perhaps being told you were not good enough? Perhaps regularly? Or it could be that you just want to express yourself without someone jumping in to say that your opinions are unfounded, or liken your ideas to a conspiracy theory (yes, that has happened to me before).

Anger projected into the present is likely to have originated from a past issue, often made much worse by hormone imbalances (read more here ), but it will usually be disguised as anger towards something else.

The ego is often blamed for certain ‘toxic feelings.’ And yes, the ego likes to dominate, it likes to be right and is also easily bruised. But an inflated ego is not always the precursor to anger within an Empath, it is more likely to be the wounds of the shadow.

The shadow holds the unresolved issues, emotional pain and insecurities that affect our behaviour and outlook on life. It also likes to trigger anger. That said, sometimes experiencing dark emotions is not always a bad thing.

Can Positive Situations Come from Anger?

There are times when anger and rage can propel us to make changes in life, pushing us onwards and upwards. It can also help us address that which needs addressing. However, when it is anger outbursts or silent anger, that quietly lingers in the shadows without serving any purpose except stress, then it is a problem!

Do we really want to punish our self for someone else’s opinion or mistake? Because that’s what we do when we host or suppress the emotion of anger.

People will always disagree. It doesn’t mean one is right and the other is wrong. There is just a difference of opinion. We do not need to convince anyone of anything. If someone is not ready to hear our opinion it is not our job to force it upon them. In fact, some people will never hear what we have to say, no matter how much truth is in our words, and that’s ok.

So, how do we tackle the anger or uncomfortable feelings that arise?

Firstly, do not suppress anger. But also, don’t take it out on others.

Many years ago, I read Louise Hay’s recommendation of using a pillow to release anger. Simply take a nice fluffy pillow and, when no one is around, beat it up. It does help.

Secondly, get familiar with the triggers:

To find out where your anger stems from, question yourself. Who are you really angry with? When you ask this question, a picture of someone will quickly come to mind often alongside an uncomfortable memory or feeling.

Do you really want that person or persons to continue to hurt you today? If the answer is no, it’s time to stop or release the anger reaction. Breathe through it or just pause and allow it to pass.

As I said, anger is hugely detrimental to health, as is any of the other stressed/pained emotions.

I realize that switching off emotions is a lot harder than just turning off a light switch. There are several other factors we have to consider. For example, have we become addicted to the hormones these emotions produce (read this post to uncover if you have a negativity addiction)? or are we unable to let go of the pain because it has become part of our identity? But understanding the cause helps in reducing the reactions.

The long-term goal is to stop feeding the shadow when it ignites an anger response. But recognizing that it is the shadow at work is halfway to making this realization.

Healing

When healed, we come to understand that what others say, think or do is more a reflection of them and not us. But until we get to this place, using grounding techniques, such as those I discuss here, will help reduce anger or prevent other emotional reactions, and a pillow is always there for those darker days.

These journeys, we are each experiencing, have been designed especially for us. The beliefs we have and the problems we face are ours to overcome. The same can be said for everyone out there. By allowing others to have their own opinion, by walking away from fights that will never be resolved, or from the people who take pleasure in putting others down, it is not only liberating but also healing. And addressing the truth behind anger goes a long way towards its release.

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time.

Diane.

©Diane Kathrine

 

 

 

Why are Empaths so often Painted as The Villain?

Have you ever been accused of saying something you didn’t say, or blamed for something you didn’t do…?

For an Empath this is more common than you might think…

I am prone to having a roving mind. Having a good old ponder on life and its many ups and downs. During my musings, I often think about my Empath traits, traits that I have lived with for so long, and the impact they have. One thing is for sure, they certainly haven’t offered the easiest ride in life, especially when being the target for unfair attacks and blame.

I know many of you lovely Empaths out there will have experienced either being painted as the villain or being on the receiving end of a character assassination at some point on your journey, and this is what I want to address today.

I have discussed this subject in other posts over the years, but with all this crazy energy affecting the people of the world I thought it a good idea to address it again.

Any Empath who spends time around people often finds themselves under attack in weird ways and for nonsensical reasons. And it’s always good to have reminders as to why these attacks happen because, let’s face it, they don’t feel good.

It is human nature to want to be accepted by others. We are pack animals and don’t always want to be ostracized from the herd (unless we are done with people)..But being wrongly accused, or blamed for something we didn’t do, usually pushes us away from family or friends because it is difficult to deal with such betrayal.

It is common for an Empath to make the mistake of believing that those in our life think and feel the way we think and feel. Therefore, it is beyond our comprehension if someone attacks us or paints us as some ‘crooked creature’.

So why is it so many Empaths are disliked, perceived as the bad guy or are wrongly accused?

There are several reasons; one of the first being:

The Mirror Effect

Empaths can unintentionally reflect what they feel in another. Revealing their truths. Anything hidden, such as insecurities, suppressed shame, guilt or anger, builds the longer it is left buried. If someone conceals traits, such as the above, that they don’t like about themselves, they are reminded of them when in an Empath’s presence.

Why Does this Happen?

Due to the fact an Empath picks up on other people’s emotions, hidden behaviours and true personality traits, we often take them on, sometimes acting them out. Otherwise known as morphing. We basically become like a mirror. Reminding the other of what they are hiding from. This can cause an instant dislike from them to us.

If this has been your experience, that someone seems cold towards you for no reason, it could be that you are reflecting the truth they deny. Or there could be another reason…

You Have a Super-Speedy Vibration

An Empath is generally always working on themselves. Working to clear toxic emotions, dark thoughts or outdated behaviours. We want to make our world into a better brighter place, and we know by making changes to ourselves it will also benefit the outside world.

When we do the work and make any positive changes to our mind, body or spirit, we become cleaner and purer. This effectively speeds up our vibration. Which is a good thing; but it can make others uncomfortable.

Just like an Empath’s need not to be around people who spew negativity, there are some who cannot stand being around those who emit a sparkly clean energy.

Now, this is not to say an Empath is perfect or that they are some kind of ‘quiet saint’. We all have flaws and weaknesses we need to work through. The whole point of life is to evolve. But vibrating in a higher space can repel people, even those we love.

What Does This Look Like?

You may have noticed when in an emotionally low place some friends prefer you that way. It seems to make them comfortable that you are suffering (which is randomly odd). Yet when we make changes and get into a higher vibrating space, those same people don’t always like it. They may try to bring us back down, by attempting to extinguish our inner-light and happiness.

This isn’t always a cruelty thing. They sense us moving away from them and lash out in the hopes it will bring us back to their level.

People sense change, whether it is visually apparent or not, they feel when another has changed or stepped up their frequency. Not everyone is ready to raise their vibration. Some still have lessons to learn at their level and are not ready to move forwards. And because they are not ready, they may try to draw us back down. This is often done by snide remarks and unkind comments. But this is not the only thing that ignites a negative response from others…

An Empath’s Quiet Nature is often Deemed as Offensive

Yes, you did just read that line correctly. Another reason people form an instant dislike of some Empaths (especially the introverts) is because of a quiet nature. Here’s why:

To those of an insecure nature, an Empath’s sometimes quiet or distant ways may be taken as a snub or a form of disrespect. We may be considered as being remote or standoffish and this can be wrongly interpreted as superior or ‘judgy’ behaviour. In other words, some people assume we believe we are ‘above them’.

Normally, when an Empath acts in an aloof or distant way, it is because we are on overload, drained and in need of a ‘timeout’. When having taken on too much stimuli, we want to be invisible to others. A fatigue meltdown means an Empath can’t deal with someone offloading their troubles. We may switch off. Even polite conversation is too much. And this behaviour is often interpreted as a rejection.

Because most people don’t feel an inch of what an Empath does, it is difficult for them to understand our need to withdraw. Sadly, the more insecure someone is, the more they are offended. If we’re seen as blowing ‘hot and cold’, our behaviour may be considered as arrogance. If this causes insult, we may be rejected, or our character is attacked as a form of retaliation.

So, if someone develops an aversion towards you, for no good reason, if they attack you behind your back or paint you as the ‘bad guy’, remember it is not always because of something you have done, instead it is a flaw or insecurity in your attacker.

People will always be threatened by an Empath’s light. We need to know that that’s ok and keep focused on what inspires or uplifts us, instead of on those who are offended by our Empath ways.

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time.

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

 

The Precipice of Change for all Empaths

Have you noticed something strange going on around you?

Do you feel tension in the air?

Have you wondered why this is happening now?

In the past few years we have seen some crazy hate campaigns going on in the media. Usually disguised as crusades for acceptance, equality or important political issues, but the true intention of these campaigns is usually to keep people distracted and divided.

In the UK we have Brexit keeping tensions high, in the US there is Trump and in between we have campaigns for racial equality, equality of the genders and more. All of which seem to be stirring up hate, anger and division.

Before I go any further, I would like to say that this is not a post on politics, issues on equality or anything like that. I am discussing how damaging all the dark energy, that is being fired up, is having and the reason for it.

I am not into politics and would never aim to influence anyone’s opinion on these matters, but what is happening now is seriously ugly, and anyone who is Sensitive will be horribly affected by the division, aggression and hate purposely stimulated.

The above campaigns are normally disguised as ‘pushes towards positive progression’, but as always within the mainstream media there is usually a hidden agenda to keep people away from their truth and self-evolvement.

Everyone wants to be accepted, and we are being told that we should be more accepting of those who are different. Acceptance of others is a good thing and should definitely be encouraged. But by stirring up hate in order to achieve this will not work. Hatred will never encourage acceptance. Evil begets evil, anger begets anger and hate begets hate.

The reason I wanted to address this subject today is because the type of energy that is being stirred up is the kind that brings an Empath down fast, if they are unfortunate enough to get caught up in it, and distracted from their own evolvement.

It is very easy for an Empath to lift the energy of others, in the form of opinions and ideas, and take them on as their own. We don’t even have to be physically in the presence of another for this to happen, reading online articles or watching videos can have the same impact. We can become so swayed by overwhelming opinions and energy that we get distracted from our life and dragged into a ‘manufactured war’. A war between people.

People are purposely being fired against each other and it is so awful to bear witness to, especially as an Empath.

Within the political world there has always been different parties, people standing for different reasons and rights. But never before have I seen such animosity stirred up, supposedly in the name of ‘standing for what is right’.

We have campaigns telling the world how we should be more accepting of others, but at the same time we are shown to hate those who don’t have the same opinions as us. It is considered ok to attack anyone who does not hold the same view, political or other, or to make assumptions on another’s beliefs and ideologies.

From where I stand, the message coming across is that its ok to silence, intimidate or attack those who stand up for what they believe in, if it doesn’t fit in with the narrative of the mainstream media. But how is this in any way progress? It’s not meant to be progress. It’s meant to throw us off track and keep us from our light.

A couple of months ago I watched a ‘Roast of Rob Lowe’ on Comedy Central. The panel of Roasters, and the audience, was filled with celebrities and well-known faces. It was just like any other Roast, of below-the-belt-banter, until Anne Coulthard got up. Talk about tumbleweeds.  

I must admit, I don’t know much about Anne Coulthard other than she is an advocate for Trump. But when she stood up, to do her Roast, the audience jeered her in such a hateful way and showed her nothing but contempt that it was difficult to watch. If the jeering was done in the ‘banterish’ way of the Roast, it might be laughed at, but it was hate-mob mentality and seriously uncomfortable viewing. Revulsion was written on the majority’s faces. And it sent a message to say if you don’t think like us or agree with us, then this is how we will treat you. This is extreme narcissism and it is scary that it seems to be so accepted!

I get that everyone has their own political opinions and beliefs. And so they should. Politics has always been an ugly arena; but the intimidation that is now happening is bullying and is not the behaviour that should be passed off as acceptable in a supposedly progressive society. We cannot be told that bullying is bad then show it as entertainment. Unless, of course, if the desired effect is to turn people against each other…

Celebrities are major influencers. People respect and admire them. Seeing celebs behaving towards others with contempt, because of their political leanings, shows the viewing world that this is the way to treat anyone who holds differing opinions.

Encouraging hate will never encourage acceptance. It just distracts and divides. The messages being sent out by the media are both confusing and contradictory. By keeping us distracted and divided it keeps us from finding unity with each other and from finding our own power.

I try to bypass anything that holds the content of hate online, but by spending a lot of time on my laptop, I sometimes find myself being drawn in on YouTube or something. When I do get drawn in, it leaves me deflated and depressed (and in serious need of chocolate). 

There are so many messages of hate being sent out in the guise of ‘striving for acceptance’, but the way these messages are portrayed are just so off track. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for acceptance, and in a perfect world we would all be capable of accepting everyone for their ‘differences’. But one thing is for sure, hate will always negate acceptance. 

There will always be differing political opinions, religious beliefs, cultural differences and varied outlooks on life. As I have said many times before, we are all different with different life paths (even as Empaths), and that is a good thing, it’s the way it is meant to be. It is so easy to waste this precious life focused on what others do or say and what they believe in, instead of focusing on finding our truth and purpose.

If you pay too much attention to the negative hype, being purposely aggravated, then you will be badly affected. By avoiding the media fracas, you will save yourself a lot of unnecessary suffering and heartache. You will feel more positive about yourself and others. Read this post to learn why Empaths are more at risk from the negativity.

We are in the midst of some incredible times for evolvement; which can be easily missed when focusing on manufactured negativity. I believe that all this BS means we are on the precipice of incredible changes for all (things get worse before they get better), but we still have to participate in any change for the better by keeping ourselves in a higher space. Doing a daily reset helps with this.

When spending your time doing what you love, and away from the media, it automatically elevates you. It also helps keep you protected from the dark energy stirred up out there. You then radiate a more powerful energy which positively impacts those you come into contact with.

Ok, that’s my musings for today.

Hope you are all having a fantastic summer… or winter.

Until next time…

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

 

Is This Normal in an Empath…?

As I’m sure your already more than aware, being an Empath certainly comes with its challenges. One such thing is suffering with heightened sensitivities, like allergies and intolerances.

For many, having sensitivities tends to go hand-in-hand with Empath life. However,  at a certain age you may find these sensitivities heighten and go into overdrive.

There are many reasons for this, but mostly it is down to a compromised immune system and shifting hormones. These changes are normally experienced from the mid-thirties onwards.

Sadly, with age, our bodies become less resilient to all kinds of stress, which means allergies and intolerances start having a greater impact.

The main difference between an allergy and an intolerance is that an allergy is triggered by the immune system, whereas an intolerance may or may not involve an immune system response. Intolerances can also trigger autoimmune reactions, where the immune system attacks the tissues of the body.

Allergic reactions show up straight away, whereas intolerances may not happen for anything up to a day or two after exposure This is the same for being ‘peopled’. The effects of being ‘peopled’ may be experienced straight away or not for 24 hours or more…

Many Empaths have intolerances that they know of, but you may have become intolerant to something or someone and not even be aware of it.

If you are in contact with something on a daily basis that you are allergic or intolerant to, you tend to have a continuous, albeit sometimes minor, reaction. For example: you may suffer with a constant stuffy nose, itchy eyes, muscle or joint discomfort, lethargy or headaches; but because the symptoms seem minor, you give little thought to them.

Most of us already know what we should or shouldn’t consume. We get that nagging feeling that something is not a fit. But when sensitivities heighten with age, we may start reacting to things we have come into daily contact with for most of our life (including certain people), and therefore not make the connection.

So, you may now be wondering what types of reactions you could experience. Here’s a brief breakdown:

  • If you drink alcohol, you may find yourself getting intoxicated ridiculously easily and feel so ill after consumption that you believe you’re going to die. Hangovers last for days or even a week. This shows your body is not able to process alcohol like it did, and it’s time to eliminate or drastically reduce your intake.
  • After eating meat, poultry or fish you feel more depressed than normal and your energy levels plummet. Some Empaths feel the energy of an animal when they consume its flesh, which can cause depression; but also the chemicals and hormones injected into meat can cause a reaction that gets worse with age.
  • Your morning coffee starts giving you the jitters, making you anxious and/or nauseous. Many Empaths find their tolerance for caffeine decreases with age.
  • The day after spending time with a certain person you feel fatigued and depressed.
  • When coming into contact with air fresheners, cleaning products, perfumes or garden chemicals, your nose starts streaming and you develop cold-like symptoms.
  • Consuming anything genetically modified triggers a host of uncomfortable symptoms for days after.
  • White sugar or wheat products makes your body lethargic and your mind race.
  • Watching TV or spending time on the internet  gives you brain fog and makes you feel restless or irritable.
  • You may find you put on weight, for no reason, which you cannot get rid of.

As Empath life already has enough challenges to deal with, you don’t want to endure any unnecessary suffering. So, if you find your sensitivities have heightened towards people, or anything else, it is a good idea to keep a lifestyle diary. Write down what you eat, chemicals you may have come into contact with in cleaning products or other, list the people you spend time with, whether you have reactions to hair dyes or beauty treatments, and make a note of time spent in front of a computer, TV or other media outlets,  (for women make a note of your monthly cycle).

By keeping notes it will eventually reveal a pattern, and help you make the connection between how you feel and what you’ve come into contact with. It also helps you determine what is triggering or heightening your sensitivities.

One of the best ways to determine an intolerance or allergy is a process of elimination: To withdraw from your life, for a time, the suspected trigger and then reintroduce it after three to four weeks. If you have become intolerant you normally have a big reaction when its reintroduced (this even works with people). If you have a negative physical or emotional reaction it is probably time to eliminate the trigger.

Here are some other posts you might find helpful for determining physical weaknesses that may have developed over the years: Here, Here and Here.

Discover how the traits of an Empath impact the way you live and how to make the most of them...

Discover how the traits of an Empath impact the way you live and how to make the most of them…

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time.

Diane.

©Diane Kathrine at Empaths Empowered

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Are Empaths Prone to a Negativity Addiction?


I was having a conversation with a friend the other day about addictions. We were discussing the fact there are so many addictions that we are not aware of, or how they impact our lives.

When we think of addictions, we often just think about the ones related to drugs or alcohol, but there are countless more.  

We get addicted to wheat, sugar, certain chemicals in foods, caffeine, sports, social media… But the addictions that are quietly destructive to our health and happiness are our addictions to negativity.

I have written in-depth about negativity addictions in my book: Become a Super-Empowered Empath, but not so much in blog posts. So, I hope to address that here.

The media knows that people have a natural draw towards negativity, because of our negativity bias. They play on this, to keep us coming back to their sites.

I often write about the importance of Empaths avoiding media outlets because of the strife it stirs up, and because it creates negative emotions.

Negative emotions give the body a rush of hormones that become addictive. That’s why so many people become hooked on having traumas and problems in their lives. These traumas fuel the brain with a hit of some of its favourite drugs: the stress hormones cortisol and adrenaline.

We read a lot about becoming addicted to dopamine, but we don’t see much about addictions to the stress hormones. But they are equally as damaging.

When the brain or body is addicted to certain stress hormones, it is much harder to recognize than with other addictions. But if not addressed, this dependence becomes the pathway to an unhappy life.

Although I have known many who have a penchant for negativity, there was one particular person I knew, who was heavily addicted (and probably still is). I will call her Shirley.

Shirley would create reasons to be angry and dissatisfied with her life, including anyone in it. She had a very one-tracked mind and would not allow herself to see anything but negativity in a situation. She pushed many people away because of her dark ramblings. Not intentionally though. Anyone who spent time with her, found themselves being dragged into wrathful discussions which would leave them feeling flat and depressed.

She blamed everyone else for her life not being the way she wanted. Shirley expected others to change for her, but not to make any changes for herself. Because she secretly thrived on negativity, she continued to draw into her life more reasons to be negative (law of attraction).

Shirley allowed negativity to make her bitter and vengeful. But that wasn’t who she was deep down. She had a kind side that got squeezed out by the darkness she allowed to grow within.

Her desire for drama was fuelled by her body/brain’s need for stress hormones. Her negativity addiction did so much damage to her life. She refused to address it or see it as being problematic, because she secretly thrived on it. Negativity became her purpose. It was an addiction that she became afraid to live without.

I’m sure every one of you reading this has come across a ‘Shirley’ in your life.

I’m not for a moment suggesting that an Empath is destined to become like Shirley. I wanted to show an extreme example of negativity addiction. However, Empaths are at risk of becoming hooked on the stress hormones stirred up by negativity.

The reason you may not consciously be aware that you are addicted to stress hormones, is because they are activated without you necessarily taking part. And what I mean by this is, the brain will be doing the work.

Once addicted, your brain will work to activate your body into releasing stress hormones by drawing your attention to anything that it knows will make you react.

Picking up and feeling other people’s stress or emotions is also a way your hormones can be triggered. Another is having had experienced trauma in childhood (the memories continue to activate stress hormones throughout life).

A negativity addiction can be at work without you even leaving your home or coming into contact with others. When not around people, stress hormones are activated mostly through the thought process.

After giving up many addictive things, I know exactly how tricky addictions are, especially with the brain. It is not until we give something up for a period of time that we see just how our choices and thoughts were governed by addiction.

With any addiction, we have to see it for ourselves.

If you suspect you have an addiction to negativity, and are therefore drawing more negativity into your life (like attracts like), you have to stay vigilant of knowing when your hormones are being spiked. You normally recognise this by the discomfort around the gut or chest area. It may feel like a burning sensation or a sense of dread.

As soon as you feel this, act immediately with a distraction so that your thoughts don’t get involved. Thoughts feed emotions. Emotions feed thoughts. Emotions are fuel for your stress hormones. You have a seventeen second window before thoughts take over and you become hostage within your own head. This post may help with distraction.

So, yes, Empaths are prone to having negativity addictions and this is because we tend to feel everything so powerfully. But there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Often when we become aware of a problem within, it is half way to overcoming it.

Hope this helps on your journey.

9 Reasons Empaths Should Avoid Negative People

Until next time…

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

 

 

The Reason This One Thing Is So Important For An Empath

 

Do you know one of the worst things for your Empath health…?

Stress!

Most Empaths know when they are experiencing stress, but they may have no idea how much of this stress is held within their muscles. Which, over time, becomes incredibly problematic to the way you show up in the world.

Our muscles are constantly stimulated through the stresses of modern life, and that’s not to mention the impact of ‘people stress.’ Because of this, even in sleep, the muscles don’t fully relax… Which, as you can probably imagine, is not good for Empath health!

Even when we think we are relaxing, we often aren’t. The TV programs we watch in the evening can have the effect of firing up the mind, which stimulates the muscles, further tensing them, and even reading certain books can put the nerves (and muscles) on edge.

Pained emotions, either your own or those you pick up throughout the day from others, are also stored within the muscles.

Stressed Muscles Leads to a Stressed Empath Mind!

Whilst reading this you will be holding tension somewhere in your body. Your forehead might be rouched,  your eyes might be squinting, your shoulders might be hunched or your wrists extended back, your legs, hips or back might be in an awkward position, all creating pressure in your muscles and joints.

We could go through the entire body, but I think it’s safe to say you are holding muscle tension somewhere.

So Why is This Such a Bad Thing?

When your muscles are constantly contracted, they are fuelling the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight). Not only is this depleting the body of vital energy, that most can ill-afford to lose, but it is also prematurely ageing, it raises blood pressure, lowers the immune system and unnecessarily heightens Empath stress.

What To Do About It

By training the muscles to soften and loosen, through relaxation, it switches on the parasympathetic nervous system. This in turn, slows the breathing, lowers blood pressure, initiates deep relaxation of body and mind, and allows healing to occur.

One of the best and easiest ways to get a muscle to relax is to tense it first.

If you’ve ever been in a yoga class and the teacher asked you to tense all the muscles in your body before relaxation, it was to aid in releasing any held tension and to allow you to relax more deeply. Here are just some of the benefits:

Relaxation Benefits

  • Reduces fatigue
  • Anti-ageing
  • Lowers blood pressure
  • Boosts the immune system
  • Induces restful sleep
  • Allows for muscle regeneration
  • Switches on the parasympathetic nervous system
  • Promotes mind stillness
  • Aides in general well-being.

It is said that the relaxation, at the end of a yoga class, is the most beneficial part of the practice. Not only is it time for the body to rest, but it’s the time the benefits of yoga practise are fully integrated.

Relaxation can be done at anytime of day but it is great to do at bedtime or after exercise.

Here’s an Easy Muscle-Tensing Technique:

  • Lie on the floor or a bed (for anyone suffering back problems: a bolster or cushion under the knees is helpful).
  • Starting at the feet, tense them for five to ten seconds then release.
  • Work up through the limbs, torso and face, tensing and relaxing each body part in turn (great distraction for the mind if you can’t sleep).
  • Finally, clench the body tight for five to tense seconds, then completely relax and go floppy.
  • Stay for a while in this deep state of stillness.

If time is short, you could tense the lower part of the body first, then the upper half, finishing on the face.

Not only does the above exercise promote relaxation but it also aids in stilling the mind.

If, as an Empath, you suffer any kind of stress conditions or chronic fatigue, doing full-body muscle tensing and relaxation is a great help to your overall well-being.

So, now you have no excuse not to spend more time relaxing. Give yourself permission to switch off and chill those muscles. It is super-beneficial for a happy, healthy life.…

If you are suffering a lot of emotional stress, you may find this post on Essential Oils for the Empath beneficial.

Hope this helps on your journey…

Until next time

Diane

©Diane Kathrine at Empaths Empowered

All Empaths Should Avoid Unnecessary Negativity

Following on from my post last week regarding the law of attraction (click here to read, otherwise this one may not make sense), I agree that negative experiences are an essential part of life and growth. I have written about this many times before in both my books and posts.

I know if I hadn’t experienced dark times, I would not have pushed myself forward to be where I am now. Many good things come out of negative situations. I am a big believer in that. Continue reading

Does An Empath Have A Disadvantage With The Law Of Attraction?

Today’s post is about an interesting comment I received on the last post I shared.

When I first read the following comment, my initial reaction was this was a negative response. It ruffled my feathers. I wasn’t sure what it was about. But I then realized there was a reference to the law of attraction in my last post. (Read my last post here).

Here is the comment:

Thinking negatively is absolutely essential if we are to change ourselves. Without negativity there is literally no driving force for change. Shame, depression, despair, sadness, anxiety, disillusionment, guilt, aloneness, self-doubt, self-dissatisfaction, feelings of inferiority etc. force self-aware individuals with a conscience to do better (‘the Theory of Positive Disintegration’, analogous to ‘the dark night of the soul’).

The ‘law of attraction’ – as it’s widely understood – is hogwash. Poor and sick people didn’t set out to be poor and sick people, and thinking happy-clappy thoughts won’t make their reality any nicer. Also, bad things happen to good people, and as well as that all sorts of low-life try to attack good people (where’s the ‘law of attraction’ in that?) There isn’t one genuinely spiritual person who hasn’t gone through an utterly miserable time from others.

Where the ‘law of attraction’ becomes even more pernicious is with new-age internet scammers who tell their victims that the ‘get rich quick’ schemes they bought into didn’t succeed because ‘they weren’t thinking positively enough’.

As I pondered my reply, I realized it would be a lengthy one. So, I decided it was a good opportunity to write a post about it instead, because a) I agree with the comment, and b) because I don’t agree with it and c) because I realize many Empaths may be of the same mind, (and d) because anything that ruffles my feathers is drawing my attention to something that needs addressing). Continue reading

Social Hangovers: What Cause Them & How Do They Impact Empath Life?

 

I’m sure many of you have experienced a social hangover. It is one of the banes of Empath life.

So, what exactly is a social hangover and how does it affect us?

Basically, it’s similar to a boozy hangover, except it’s caused from consuming too much people energy and it happens whether you drink alcohol or not.

The physical symptoms are varied from one Empath to the next, but here are just a few: fatigue, headaches and generally feeling blah. For more extreme cases, it may require a day in bed.

Back in the days when I used to drink alcohol, I assumed feeling rough the day after was all down to guzzling too many Budweiser. So, when I ventured out alcohol free, I was surprised to discover I still got the ‘hangover’.

I soon clicked on to the fact that it was the aftereffects of being peopled (alcohol had just heightened the impact). Continue reading

Is it Time to Let Them Go?


Being in harmony with people is essential to an Empath’s health and wellbeing.

It should go without saying that as Empaths we should be extra vigilant of not only whom we allow into our life but also those we allow to stay.

Is it time to let them go?

This isn’t about us thinking we’re too good for some people. It’s about letting go of those who constantly make us feel bad, who drain our energy and suck the joy from our life. And that should probably include the people who are angry or bitter towards us, those who attack or lie about us to others and those who seem to enjoy seeing us suffer.

Sadly, the people this includes is most often adult family members or friends who we would have at one time considered close. Continue reading

Why Do Empaths Have Such a Strong Sense of Not Belonging?

Too many Empaths go through life feeling like they don’t belong. It’s as though they have been dumped in a reality that is not a fit for them… So why is that?

Even before we discover who we are, as Empaths, we can feel like a giant square peg trying to squeeze into a tiny hole.

We look around at those who glide through life, following the rules laid down by society, who appear contented with the way the system operates and who slot in with others effortlessly. Even if they are unhappy, they never seem to question anything, nor find fault with ‘the way things work’. We may wonder why is it so easy for them to ‘fit in’ but not for us?

There are several reasons for this ‘sense of not belonging’ the Empath has; one of which being the way we ‘feel’. Continue reading

A Guide to Surviving Christmas for the Empath

As I was nosing through some of my older posts, I came across one I had posted two Christmases ago (read it here). The post made me smile because I remembered how much I disliked the month of December and how bad I always felt when it came to the ‘Silly Season’.

But this year, it’s been different. In truth, I have loved every minute of the month. I have loved the crisp coldness and dark winter evenings, and having to wrap up in warm winter woollies. I find myself gazing at the twinkling lights, dangling from the trees and houses in the neighbourhood, in awe and I have truly enjoyed socializing and getting together with friends.

Another factor which has left me rather astonished is that I have not been taken down by all the crazy ’emotional’ energy stirred up during the Christmas period. I put this down to the fact that I am constantly working on myself to stay in balance. I also have lots of ‘grounding and re-balancing tricks’ up my sleeve.

Many Empaths face a daily ’emotional and physical hangover’ during the month of December. It kind of goes with the territory. But you do not need to suffer unnecessarily.

Different types of emotional stress trigger different responses within an Empath. For this reason, it is a good idea to experiment with ‘new’ grounding techniques at this time of year, to help stay detached from the emotional energy of others.

You may find the following techniques (from my last Christmas post) beneficial:

Surviving Christmas

Daily Grounding

Most Empaths have a daily grounding ritual, but to stay out of the ‘Christmas stress’ we need to add something extra to it… childlike positivity.

Adopting childlike excitement into your energy can help protect you from the stress energy of others.

You only have to cast your mind back to childhood to remember how explosively exciting Christmas was. So, instead of tuning into people’s stress energy, focus your awareness on the exhilaration you had in childhood. It is uplifting and energizing.

Carry Haematite or Other Protective Stones

Haematite is both grounding and mirroring, and it will help protect you when in busy, stressed places (basically everywhere over the festive period).

Keeping a piece with you at all times is a good way to shield yourself from unwanted energy. If you want to learn more about the benefits of Haematite for the Empath see this post.

Eat Lots of Bright Coloured Food

Oranges, lemons and limes, red apples, blueberries and bananas, for example, will help keep you protected and healthy over the silly season.

Christmas contributes to bad eating. Party food and alcohol carry little in the way of nutrients, and if we pick up lots of stress energy the immune system will be compromised.

By eating plenty of lovely bright coloured foods it ensures you get lots of vitamins and enzymes which wards off colds and builds your resilience towards stress-related illness.

When we eat brightly coloured food, in the form of delicious fruit and veg, we reap many benefits.

Also whether we gaze upon brightly coloured fruit or consume it, it is beneficial. Colour raises our mood and vibration and that is always going to be super-beneficial at this time of year.

Shake it Off

If you get overwhelmed by too much stress energy, a brilliant way to get rid of it is by shaking it off.

Start by giving each leg a good shake, shake your bottom and your torso, shake your arms and hands, blubber through your lips and wobble your cheeks, run your hands through your hair and give the scalp a good shake (I do not recommend shaking the head as tension is often held in the neck).

Shaking works even better if you can do it in water and/or with some uplifting funky music.

The shaking method also works great if you pick up on any anger energy.

Eat Chocolate

Eating moderate amounts of chocolate is a perfect and delicious, way for an Empath to ground and recharge.

Many Empaths are naturally drawn to chocolate, their inner-knowing already knows of its benefits. However, not all chocolate is created equal, the darker the chocolate the better, and if it is organic, perfect!

Opt for minimum 70% cocoa when choosing your chocolate fix.

Dark chocolate is super healthy as long as it in not loaded with unrefined sugar.

White refined sugar is inflammatory. It causes excess cortisol to be released into the body which then heightens uncomfortable emotions and stress for the Empath (click here to learn more).

Practice Gratitude

Christmas can cause overwhelm for an Empath and may put them in a negative mindset, but by practising gratitude it can raise the spirits like nothing else.

Being grateful for what you already have in your life brings in more things to be thankful for. Or, if you don’t feel like you have much to be grateful for, be grateful for the amazing things that are coming your way.

You will be amazed at just how uplifting this is. It also works like chocolate and floods your system with feel good hormones.

Here are some more posts that will help the Empath with Xmas stress

If you need to relax this post will help:  Incredible Relaxation Technique for the Empath

If you pick up on other people’s stress energy and emotions cast your eyes over this: Protection for the Empath

And if you spend time around overly negative people you need to read this: Reasons to Avoid Negative People

Wishing you all much love, happiness and festive fun.

Diane

©Diane Kathrine.

START THE NEW YEAR AS AN EMPOWERED EMPATH Click Here

 

The Easy Empath Elixir

Are you one of the many Empaths who struggles to stay in  control of how you feel?

You are not alone. The stresses of ‘Empath life’ certainly takes its toll on the emotional and physical wellbeing of many Empaths.

But did you know that just by drinking more water you can become healthier, both emotionally and physically?

Sound too good to be true…? Read on…

The body consists of up to 75% water (some body tissue has 95%), so it will come as no surprise that we need to drink lots of water to stay in balance physically and mentally.

When out-of-sorts, we can turn to water as a quick pick-me-up. Not only will it help keep the body functioning properly but it also helps in dealing with Empath overwhelm and emotional energy.

Most are unaware just how dehydrated they are, because they regularly drink fluids throughout the day. But as the body uses so much water, just to function, it is quickly being used and in constant need of replenishment.

Breathing alone loses a quarter of the body’s water, on a daily basis, and that’s without any physical exertion.

Dehydration affects well-being, appearance and accelerates the aging process. Being well-hydrated is essential to keep the body functioning and the energy levels stable.

We could not survive more than a few days without fluid and this should make it clear how important it is.

But not only does an insufficient supply of water create problems with the functioning of the body and mind, it can also influence how an Empath experiences the energy of others.

Because they are often on overload, from experiencing too much emotional energy, the Empath’s filtering system does not always work as efficiently as it could; meaning toxins stay in the body longer than they should. Which can play havoc with their emotions. Continue reading

Why Do So Many Empaths Feel Unble to Connect With Others?


If you are one of the many Empaths who feel unable to make real connections with people, or with life itself, know that you are not alone and that there is a reason for it.

We don’t always realize, but life is a series of linked events; each one leading to the next, like the spots on a dot-to-dot puzzle. Yet, most are unaware that the seemingly random occurrences of life and a feeling of ‘disconnect’ are in any way pivotal to the course of our destiny…

Because the mind is kept so busy trying to make sense of life’s conundrums,  we are often kept from connecting the dots on our unique and mysterious life puzzle. Our Empath sensitivities may also prevent us from seeing how amazing our lives are, or how this sense of ‘disconnectedness’ serves us.

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The majority of us work hard trying to figure out life. We may wonder where our true purpose lies or we may constantly find ourselves looking at ways to better fit in with others. It may even feel like we are not on the ‘right path’.

Why do so many Empaths feel disconnected?

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It may certainly seem that the Empath is destined to go through life feeling off-course, unfulfilled, overwhelmed, or unable to connect. There are many things that come with being an Empath that makes them push people away: getting hurt easily, feeling others’ emotional pain, and being a beacon for other people’s problems being but a few. This in itself can lead to feelings of being disconnected.

It is easy to forget that we came here for a reason: to experience life as an Empath, and the many challenges that go with it, because we get distracted by the obstacles we face.

Empath life is often strenuous, painful, overly emotional, sometimes lonely and often comes with a huge sense of disconnect from others. Which is ironic considering we feel the energy of people so powerfully. But, when we allow ourselves to see it, Empath life is also enlightening, invigorating, electrically charged and a true gift.

Empaths can boast of life experiences few can expect to have. We feel things others don’t and we have a strong sense of intuition that will take us to all the right places, if we believe in it and follow its guidance.

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Sometimes, we purposely make life more difficult for ourselves, without realizing. And sometimes we allow ourselves to wallow in self-pity or we get stuck in victim mentality. We may also subconsciously choose to ignore what we need to do to keep us safe and sane on our journey. But the keys to our happiness and ‘reconnection’ are always there for us to find, when we are ready.

So, to get to the reason for not feeling connected to others: Being disconnected keeps us moving forward, looking for ways to better ourself or find the answers. If we were to feel extremely contented and comfortable in life, we would not look for ways to become empowered.

As an Empath, it is easy to see dark or challenging times as punishments, but when we come through the other side we always find an incredible gift inside the experience.

The experiences we have, really are unique, and every difficulty we have endured and overcome has catapulted us forward, shaping the course of our life.

When we connect the dots of our past, we  see a bigger picture emerge. Everything happens for a reason.  Even feeling disconnected shapes and changes us, pushing us towards evolvement.

Listen to your soul, tune into your intuition and don’t be afraid to make the changes you know that will reconnect you to your truth, purpose and happiness, and in turn others.

You may also find this post helpful: Why do Empaths have such a strong sense of not belonging?

Hope this helps on your journey… books for empath

Until next time.

Diane.

©Diane Kathrine