Is it Time to Let Them Go?


Being in harmony with people is essential to an Empath’s health and wellbeing. So, it should go without saying that as Empaths we should be extra vigilant of not only whom we allow into our life but also those we allow to stay.

This issue isn’t about being egotistical or ‘special’, and it’s not about thinking we’re too good for some people. It’s about letting go of those who constantly make us feel bad, who drain our energy and suck the joy from our life. And that should probably include the people who are angry or bitter towards us, those who attack or lie about us to others and those who seem to enjoy seeing us suffer.

Sadly, the people this includes is most often adult family members or friends who we would have, at one time, considered close.

Unfortunately, most people manage to invoke an emotional response within the Empath at some point, and it is often the kindest of people who carry the most pain. If we were to let go of all those who ignited an undesirable emotional reaction, we would probably be left with no one in our life. Occasionally being triggered or feeling another’s pain is nothing compared to what certain people can make an Empath feel, especially those who seem to thrive on ‘all things negative’.

Super-charged-negative people can drain your energy within a matter of minutes of being in their presence. Too often, you end up wearing the energy of these people for days after exposure. And nothing you try seems to prevent their dark vibes seeping into your aura.

Because an Empath cares and has deep empathy for those suffering, they tend to avoid doing anything that, they consider, may cause pain to others. Even to those who refuse to change and have allowed their unhappiness to make them bitter and angry and who blame the world for their unhappiness. It is for this reason many Empaths keep in their lives those who cause them great unhappiness.

Empaths often feel they have a responsibility to help others help themselves to change. But many of those people do not want to change and, although they may protest otherwise, they actually enjoy living under a cloud of negativity.

It might sound selfish to suggest that one must always put the emotional health of self first, but it’s true. We have a responsibility to keep our body and mind healthy. If another continually causes you stress it will eventually make you ill (continuous stress causes illness).

If a food or substance made you violently ill or caused you to feel depressed, you would likely avoid it; the same should be applied to those who cause you emotional turmoil or those who take pleasure in putting or keeping you down.

 

You may learn from bad experiences, but you don’t need to keep experiencing another person’s negativity to grow.

Why do Empaths get so badly affected by the negativity of others?

Most Empaths tend to continuously work on making themselves better people. When you work on yourself, and make any positive changes to your mind, body or spirit, you become cleaner and purer. Your vibration then speeds up and anything of a lower vibration can feel plain awful… and that includes negative people.

Another fact that has to be taken into consideration is that when you vibrate in a ‘higher space’ it can cause a reaction in those around you. People sense change, whether it is visually apparent or not. They feel when another has changed or stepped up their frequency and some don’t like it.

You have probably already noticed that when in an emotionally low place, some friends prefer you that way. Yet when you make changes and put yourself in a high vibrating space, those same friends don’t like it. They may try to bring you back down and attempt to extinguish your inner-light and happiness.

Because not everyone is ready to raise their vibration they may try to draw you back down to their level and they can do this through snide remarks or mean behaviour. Some still have lessons to learn at their level and are not ready to move forwards, but they may resent the fact that you are.

The purpose of an Empath’s suffering

The further I travel down this road, the more I see the higher purpose served behind the dark behaviours displayed in people.

When we endure difficulties, by experiencing challenging situations or relationships, we eventually come to realise what we need to change for our own growth and development.

We can learn so much from the bad behaviour of others. Even if it’s as simple as developing the courage to say no, or believe in one’s own self-worth, let go of the need to be in control or to finally walk away from those who continually make us feel bad.

Any undesirable behaviour that repeats, in any type of relationship, is something that needs to be investigated. Repetition highlights flaws or issues that need to be worked on and learnt from. We all learn from the bad situations presented in life. But if the same emotional scenarios keep playing out, no one is gaining, learning or growing from the situation and it is time to cut the cord. (If others truly care and want to keep you in their life they will work to change their ways.)

Once you have learned from an experience you don’t need to re-learn it over and over. You may learn from bad experiences, but you don’t need to keep experiencing the same peoples’ bad behaviour to grow.

This is not about being spiteful or uncaring. You can be grateful for all they have shown you in life and still keep the love you have for them. But if you know in your heart that a relationship is doing you more harm than good and it feels time to let them go, then it is probably time to let them go.

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time…

Diane.

©Diane Kathrine

 

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Are You Dealing With the Aftermath of Strange Energy?

Have you been feeling off this past week or so? Have you been picking up dark energy, feeling fatigued, frustrated, edgy or anxious? Has your appetite increased or have you been craving sugary foods?

If you answered yes to any of the above, you’re not alone. There’s certainly been a strange energy lingering, which is very likely due to aftereffects of the solar activity last week. Read more about it here.

When there are any shifts or changes in energy or excessive solar activity, the effects can ricochet out and be felt for days or weeks after by an Empath.

I wouldn’t normally put out a post so close to my last one, but as I have observed some strange behaviour and felt a real heaviness in the energy these past several days, I thought it a good idea to send this out in case any of you have been impacted.

I posted the following article a couple of years ago, but as it is still as relevant today as when I initially wrote it, the advice still applies…

In recent years there has been such a lot happening with energetic changes. And anything to do with energy shifting will always affect the Empath in weird and wonderful ways.

But it is how it impacts others that might disrupt your life as an Empath.

When there is any type of ‘shift’ it usually brings to the surface that which has long been buried within the populace. Which often causes conflict, activates anger issues and finger-pointing.

If as an Empath you experience waves of feeling emotionally floored, angry, anxious or under attack, with no real reason for it, it could simply be down to a shift.

When these shifts happen you may, at times, feel like you are out-of-body, observing life as it is going on around you, but not really feeling part of it. It might seem as though you are watching helplessly from the side-lines as others refuse to face the truths of themselves or of this world and that everywhere people seem angry and preoccupied with issues or concerns. They are busy looking for ways to project this anger and they lash out, which then fuels it further.

This destructive emotional energy then just builds and builds and becomes more overwhelming for those of us who are Sensitive.

When we are simply observing the madness going on around us, in a detached way, it does us no harm. But it is too easy to become embroiled in it all and thus take on emotional energy that does not belong to us.

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Because the ‘anger energy’ stirred up by shifts, can be powerful, our mind wants to search out a logical explanation and reason for it. Even if the emotion doesn’t belong to us.

For example, if you had a disagreement with a friend or family member in the past where you felt betrayed or treated unjustly, you might find yourself festering over those memories; even though you have already forgiven those involved or let the situation go.

But if the mind cannot find a memory to attach the emotional energy to, it will look for something else to connect with. You may find yourself drawn into an injustice happening to a friend or family member. A political issue, that would not normally garner your attention, suddenly draws you in and winds you up the wrong way. Or you may become engaged in an issue that isn’t really there.

As Empaths, when we absorb strong emotional energy belonging to another we can still be tricked into believing it is our own. No matter how aware or how much work we have done on ourselves, we can still be taken off guard by these potent energies

Here are some ways in which you might experience energy shifts:

1. Waking Up Vexed: This is a common theme. Waking up in the morning, or in the middle of the night, with your mind already focusing on some past injustice, that had not even been remotely on your mind. These memories take over your thoughts which then trigger emotional responses. If you start your day in a low mood, you will draw to you more situations that match this low mood energy and the darker your day becomes. Continue reading

Why Do Empaths Have Such a Strong Sense of Not Belonging?

Too many Empaths go through life feeling like they don’t belong. It’s as though they have been dumped in a reality that is not a fit for them… So why is that?

Even before we discover who we are, as Empaths, we can feel like a giant square peg trying to squeeze into a tiny hole.

We look around at those who glide through life, following the rules laid down by society, who appear contented with the way the system operates and who slot in with others effortlessly. Even if they are unhappy, they never seem to question anything, nor find fault with ‘the way things work’. We may wonder why is it so easy for them to ‘fit in’ but not for us?

There are several reasons for this ‘sense of not belonging’ the Empath has; one of which being the way we ‘feel’. Continue reading

Why the Unusual Empath Reaction to Inauthenticity?

 

Empaths have a strong sense of integrity. They know they shouldn’t lie for personal gain, or to manipulate others, and although they strive towards living their truth, it is difficult to do when the world is filled with such dishonesty and corruption.

We are living in a time where silver-tongued fraudsters, who spin twisted webs of deceit, are rewarded for their outspoken dishonesty, and those who speak their truth often get attacked. And because of this, many end up living in a state of cognitive dissonance.

cognitive dissonance meaning

Whilst the world is awash with such hyped propaganda and disinformation, something will always feel off to the Empath. Continuous lies causes conflict and chaos within the Empath psyche, and the current global deceptions is a reason many are struggling to accept, or find, their roles in life.

But it’s not just living under a disingenuous, power-corrupt establishment that creates imbalance within the Empath, simply being in the presence of inauthenticity throws them into disarray

When in the company of those whose words don’t match their vibrational energy, the Empath brain tends to scramble. So much so, they struggle to form a coherent sentence when in their presence.

This mind-numbing effect is caused by the ‘Empathic antenna’ sensing all is not what it seems. It is detecting a person not showing the true reflection of who they are.

In most cases, when someone creates a fake persona, it is a way to hide a side they believe will be rejected. Every human wants to feel special and loved. And if someone feels unworthy, they may create a fake side they hope will be accepted.

But inauthenticity breeds and feeds. And an initial quest to ‘fit in’ can escalate, over time, into a darker manipulative personality.

 

its-better-to-be-hated

When an Empath encounters inauthentic people they may, initially, assume it is their own insecurities creating the unusual ‘freeze effect’ they experience. But what is really happening is a brain scramble caused by contradictory energy.

Brain scramble may cause: confusion, stumbling over words, memory and thought process being unpleasantly affected, nervousness, and anxiety. Continue reading

The End of the World as We Know It?

Although I have dislike of watching strong violence on the TV, I do have a penchant for zombie and end of world catastrophe movies. One of my favourites being ‘World War Z’. It only recently dawned on me that these zombie films are almost like a metaphor for the world we live in today.

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In a typical zombie film, a plague or virus wipes out the human host. It may look like the body is alive, but it is just going through the motions, whilst under the control of a parasitical hive-minded predator. The zombie is unable to show empathy, think for itself or express any emotion, other than rage, and all it seemingly can do is attack those not akin to it. Hmmm, sound familiar?

We are surrounded by what seems like many non-thinking sleepwalkers who are just going through the motions of life but aren’t really taking part in it. They follow the protocol of: consume, reproduce, sleep and obey (If you’ve ever seen the film ‘They Live’ you’ll know where I’m coming from) and don’t seem able to see, never mind question, the wrongdoings currently happening in the world.

Our reality has shifted, and the world is becoming more divided. We are seeing evidence of this everywhere we look. The polarities are so tangible now and it truly seems like there is a war between light and dark being played out. We are in the midst of some challenging, earth shifting times, that are affecting everyone in some way or other. The Empaths are feeling these changes in a pungently unpleasant way.

People are being played off against one another. With their minds distracted and preoccupied, it has kept them from waking up to the truth of themselves and the world. This is causing friction and frustration. There are a lot of unhappy folks out there, looking for ways to express their pain. They don’t know why they are feeling the way they are, they just want somewhere to offload their aggravations, and guess who frequently gets in the firing line…? yes, the Empaths and Sensitive.

What is Happening? Continue reading

Are You a Morphing Empath?

morphing

If you are an Empath you have probably had at least one morphing experience. Some of you may experience it on a daily basis.

For the purpose of this post, I shall liken Empath morphing to having an encounter with a boggart… You would have to be familiar with Harry Potter to understand where I am going with this.

In the Harry Potter books a boggart is described as a shape-shifting non-being that takes on the form of the viewer’s worst fear.

So what does this have to do with an Empath you might ask? Continue reading

Why the Comparison Between an Empath and an Introvert Narcissist?

Contrary to the title of this post, I am not suggesting that Empaths are in fact covert introvert narcissists. The title was just to grab your attention. The reason being, last week an article came to my attention that made me stop in my tracks and was the cause for a lengthy conversation with myself about the traits of a narcissist and how they could be confused with the traits of an Empath.

As you read on you will understand why I felt the need to write this post and address this subject.

There is much written about Empaths and narcissists and the toxic relationships that can result from these encounters. But I have had many comments on my site (which I don’t publish if they are overly negative or attacking) comparing Empaths to narcissists and this is why I would like to address the, subject.

Narcissism is defined as a psychological condition characterized by self-preoccupation and incredibly high self-esteem with a distinct lack of empathy.

The origin of narcissism stems from the myth of Narcissus, the youth from ancient Greece who fell in love with his own reflection in the water, only to drown in the process.

Continue reading