Everyone has times when they are not happy. There will always be ups and downs. Life tends to throw things our way that take us off course or puts us in a dark place for a period of time.
Everyone experiences difficulties. No one is exempt. And it’s not always because you are doing something wrong. However, there are some ways of being that will keep you unhappy if you don’t work to fix them. The good news is they are very fixable. The problem is just figuring out what is really making us unhappy. Because, it is too easy to blame it on the wrong thing.
As the old saying goes: ‘You’re not unhappy for the reasons you think.’
So, without further ado, let’s take a look at 7 reasons why you might not be happy as an Empath: Continue reading →
As you know, here on my blog, I like to write articles about how to make life easier for an Empath, and how to combat the emotions they often have to deal with.
One of those ways is by sipping a lovely cup of healing char.
Teas that calm your soul and soothe your emotions have so many benefits for an Empath.
Because, let’s face it, one problem that comes with Empath life is having heightened or erratic emotions. (Especially after what we’ve all been through these past two years.)
Heightened emotions can lead to all sorts of health issues, especially of the adrenal glands (endocrine glands that produce the stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol).
When the adrenals get overactivated, by too much stress, it can cause a whole host of mental and physical problems, as well as autoimmune conditions…
Increased cortisol can also lead to weight gain (hello pot belly), without you having to overeat. Which is made all the worse worse if you drink coffee with caffeine.
So, anything we can do to help soothe our emotions, naturally, is a big bonus for all-round wellbeing (and for our waistline). And this is where herbal teas come in…
Nature gave us many of the things we need to heal, or find calm in life, in the way of herbs and spices. Too often, when on the hunt for a ‘quick-fix’, we overlook these powerful healers.
As I was nosing through some of my older posts, I realised I have written many ways for Empaths to block the emotional energy of others, but I have not got one post that is specifically dedicated to just that.
So, today, I present you with some of the top ways to block the emotions you may pick up from others. The techniques also work in balancing your own emotions. A win-win situation for Empath wellbeing.
Hot Amygdala
As you may already know, Empaths tend to have an overactive Amygdala, which, when one is experiencing uncomfortable emotions, activates the stress hormones. Read more on the subject here.
The problem is, when an Empath is around people, whether in the home or out and about, they can pick up their stressed emotions and take them on as their own. This in turn activates the Amygdala. Continue reading →
Going through life over-feeling emotions and the emotional energy of others can create the perception of being unsafe, especially when out in public or around certain people. Feeling unsafe can put the body into fight-or-flight mode, which is a response of the sympathetic nervous system.
When the body is in fight-or-flight it is in a constant state of stress, which is heavily damaging to the body and mind, and can trigger anxiety and panic attacks.
Having knowledge of what we can do if we start to suffer with anxiety or panic attacks, even when they have been triggered by other people’s energy, can ensure we don’t needlessly suffer.
The following are some simple steps that can help keep you to ‘feel safe’, which in turn will help with or prevent anxiety and panic attacks…
1. Keep away from people who make you feel unsafe:
If you don’t feel safe, or have trust issues with certain friends or family members, or if you don’t feel they have your best interest at heart, it can cause emotional trauma. It is wise to avoid those who create safety issues for you.
2. Check your diet:
Are you eating chemical-laden foods, or foods that are known to trigger autoimmune conditions? Anxiety can sometimes be a warning from your body, telling you to pay attention. If you suspect your diet is activating anxiety or panic attacks, keeping a food diary can help you pinpoint the triggers. Read more on this post.
3. Supplement wisely:
Even with the healthiest of diets it is difficult to know we are getting, or absorbing, a full range of nutrients. We often eat anti-nutrient foods without realising (foods that block or hinder nutrient absorption), which means the good stuff we do take in doesn’t get chance to do its job. Vitamin and mineral deficiency can be a big trigger for anxiety. A basic supplementation regime can help in regards to anxiety and panic attacks. This post gives more info.
4. Take Valerian Root:
Valerian root is a natural herb used for treating anxiety and insomnia. Similar to melatonin, valerian root puts you in relaxed sleepy state. Valerian contains a neurotransmitter called GABA, that is known to have a powerfully calming effect on the mind.
5. Do therapeutic exercise:
Yoga and walking are probably two of the most therapeutic forms of exercise. There is a type of yoga to suit everyone, but it has to be practised regularly to see results. Walking is easy and super beneficial for the body and mind. Also, high intensity exercise, which helps release human growth hormone, can be beneficial for stopping anxiety.
6. Use crystals:
There are many different types of crystals that can help with anxiety. Rose Quartz in particular is a lovely stone to help with panic attacks. It is a love stone that helps calm the emotions. When choosing crystals for anxiety it is best to see them in person (instead of ordering online). If gazing on a certain stone makes you feel calm inside it is generally a good choice.
7. Salt therapy:
Taking salt baths, especially Epsom Salts, can be incredibly calming and soothing for the body and mind. Even better, if you live near an ocean taking a daily dip can work wonders for soothing anxiety. This post gives more details.
8. Check your water levels:
If you are dehydrated, even just a little, it can trigger anxiety and panic attacks. This post gives more information.
9. Reduce wireless air time:
More research is coming to light showing how WIFI is a major cause of anxiety and panic attacks, especially when spending a lot of time wirelessly downloading on the internet (YouTube, etc.). Give yourself a few days away from WIFI and see what effect it has. Switch your phone to aeroplane mode when not in use and limit your time on the internet. This post explains more.
10. Keep your bedroom as a calm zone:
Quality sleep is important for preventing anxiety and panic attacks. Don’t keep electrical gadgets, especially WIFI gadgets, in the bedroom. Keep your bedroom well aired and clean. Use black out curtains to ensure a solid night’s sleep.
11. Use essential oils:
Essential oils are perfect for instilling calm. Lavender being one of the best allrounders, but other good ones are Basil, Chamomile or Geranium. You can normally feel the calming effects of these essential oils within ten minutes of application. Simply massage a few drops, mixed with a teaspoon of oil, into the soles of your feet. Or use them in your bath, add them to your body oils or put a few drops on your pillow before sleep time. Check this post out for more essential oils and their benefits.
12. Avoid caffeine:
Caffeine is one of the worst things for triggering panic attacks and anxiety. It is found in coffee, tea, chocolate and colas. Avoidance will go a long way to keeping anxiety and panic attacks at bay.
13. Avoid stimulants:
Alcohol and recreational drugs can be another big trigger of anxiety. Many people assume alcohol is a relaxant, but it is when the effects wear off that the problems start.
14. Avoid chemicals:
If you are Sensitive, it often means you will be sensitive to chemicals in products and scents, which can trigger many unusual physical reactions and stress within the body. Keep your products as natural as possible, including laundry detergent, household cleaning products and personal hygiene products.
15. Listen to soothing sounds:
There are some incredibly soothing sounds that can help reduce anxiety. Ocean sounds, angelic harmonies, thunderstorms, gentle chimes, etc. are incredibly calming to the body and mind. Try to avoid live music downloads (such as on YouTube) as the WIFI can trigger more anxiety. Perhaps buy a CD and listen through headphones.
16. Don’t eat late at night:
Eating late at night can be the trigger for sleep anxiety and panic attacks. Try to have your last meal at least three hours before bedtime to ensure it is digested. If you do need to eat close to bedtime, try to make sure it is low sugar/carb food.
17. Get out in Nature:
This is a perfect remedy for anxiety and panic disorder. Even listening to the birds singing is beneficial. Read more here on the benefits of nature for an Empath.
18. Massage and reflexology:
Massaging body treatments work wonders for helping with anxiety, especially reflexology, which works on the reflex points on your feet. Schedule in time for yourself and book in a weekly treatment to help soothe your body and mind.
19. Use meditation and breathing exercises:
Breathing and meditation practices help cultivate more positive thoughts, help balance the stress hormones and instil calm. However, some people find meditation too stressful to perform when experiencing panic attacks or anxiety. The stillness can become unnerving. In these cases, moving meditations, such as yoga with the breath, or deep breathing is massively beneficial.
The Whisky Breath is a quick breathing exercise which can offer instant relief. Simply inhale for a count of four and then exhale for a count of eight. Continue for as long as you need. This exercise switches on the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps to prevent or stop panic attacks. The three-minute meditation performed daily, after doing the Whisky Breath breathing, will help keep the mind positive and anxiety at bay.
There’s more information on breathing exercises and yoga here and here.
20. Talk to a specialist:
If you know you have supressed past trauma such as a bereavement, emotional or physical abuse, or unresolved issues, it might help to talk to a trained therapist. Supressed trauma is often reignited in times of stress, which often triggers panic attacks.
21. Have your hormones checked:
This is a big one, especially for women. If you are going through any kind of hormonal transition, such as perimenopause or menopause, it can be a big trigger for anxiety, fearful emotions and panic attacks. Perimenopause often starts from the late thirties onwards and can create many unusual and uncomfortable physical and mental symptoms. (I will be writing more about this in the future).
So, there you go. Hopefully, you will have found something on the list that will help if you have been feeling unsafe, suffering with fear, anxiety or panic attacks.
If you are one of the many Empaths who feel unable to make real connections with people, or with life itself, know that you are not alone and that there is a reason for it.
We don’t always realize, but life is a series of linked events; each one leading to the next, like the spots on a dot-to-dot puzzle. Yet, most are unaware that the seemingly random occurrences of life and a feeling of ‘disconnect’ are in any way pivotal to the course of our destiny…
Because the mind is kept so busy trying to make sense of life’s conundrums, we are often kept from connecting the dots on our unique and mysterious life puzzle. Our Empath sensitivities may also prevent us from seeing how amazing our lives are, or how this sense of ‘disconnectedness’ serves us.
The majority of us work hard trying to figure out life. We may wonder where our true purpose lies or we may constantly find ourselves looking at ways to better fit in with others. It may even feel like we are not on the ‘right path’.
Why do so many Empaths feel disconnected?
It may certainly seem that the Empath is destined to go through life feeling off-course, unfulfilled, overwhelmed, or unable to connect. There are many things that come with being an Empath that makes them push people away: getting hurt easily, feeling others’ emotional pain, and being a beacon for other people’s problems being but a few. This in itself can lead to feelings of being disconnected.
It is easy to forget that we came here for a reason: to experience life as an Empath, and the many challenges that go with it, because we get distracted by the obstacles we face.
Empath life is often strenuous, painful, overly emotional, sometimes lonely and often comes with a huge sense of disconnect from others. Which is ironic considering we feel the energy of people so powerfully. But, when we allow ourselves to see it, Empath life is also enlightening, invigorating, electrically charged and a true gift.
Empaths can boast of life experiences few can expect to have. We feel things others don’t and we have a strong sense of intuition that will take us to all the right places, if we believe in it and follow its guidance.
Sometimes, we purposely make life more difficult for ourselves, without realizing. And sometimes we allow ourselves to wallow in self-pity or we get stuck in victim mentality. We may also subconsciously choose to ignore what we need to do to keep us safe and sane on our journey. But the keys to our happiness and ‘reconnection’ are always there for us to find, when we are ready.
So, to get to the reason for not feeling connected to others: Being disconnected keeps us moving forward, looking for ways to better ourself or find the answers. If we were to feel extremely contented and comfortable in life, we would not look for ways to become empowered.
As an Empath, it is easy to see dark or challenging times as punishments, but when we come through the other side we always find an incredible gift inside the experience.
The experiences we have, really are unique, and every difficulty we have endured and overcome has catapulted us forward, shaping the course of our life.
When we connect the dots of our past, we see a bigger picture emerge. Everything happens for a reason. Even feeling disconnected shapes and changes us, pushing us towards evolvement.
Listen to your soul, tune into your intuition and don’t be afraid to make the changes you know that will reconnect you to your truth, purpose and happiness, and in turn others.
It is my theory that an Empath’s reactions to other people’s emotions can work in a similar way to an allergy. I’m not sure how much you know about allergies, so let me briefly explain:
If you suffer with non-life-threatening allergies and you come into contact with something you are allergic to on a daily basis, you normally suffer mild symptoms (I say mild, but that is not to say they are not uncomfortable). However, if you spend time away from these allergens, and then come back into contact with them, the allergic reaction will be much more severe.
In fact, one way a food allergy is determined is by avoiding common food triggers for a period of time, then reintroducing them one at a time. When an allergy is present, and the food is reintroduced, the reactions are always heightened and experienced far worse than when including the food group every day.
So, this is how, I believe, for many Empaths, people’s emotional energy can act like allergies. When around people every day we might have ‘milder people-energy reactions.’ But because we have been kept away from people for so long, the emotional impact, when venturing into peopled places, may be felt far worse.
The most common symptoms being experienced are fatigue, depression, anger and general heightened emotions (that’s not to mention the sense of impending doom that is lingering in the air). It might also trigger stomach discomforts, especially around the solar plexus area (the seat of emotions). Anything from indigestion to cramps can be induced by the stress and anxiety triggered from suddenly experiencing too much emotional energy.
The good news is there is a certain hormone that acts like an ‘energetic antihistamine’ in the way it helps soothe the emotions. It is a hormone that can be released by taking some simple measures, and it goes by the name of oxytocin.
Oxytocin is a powerful hormone and neurotransmitter. It has many incredible benefits. It is known as the love hormone, for the reason it plays a big role in the emotional bond between mother and child, but its benefits go way beyond that.
Oxytocin affects the function of the brain and nervous system and greatly impacts the emotions.
Low levels of oxytocin are connected with conditions such as: heightened emotions, depression, anxiety, social phobias, PTSD and more.
Studies suggest that by increasing oxytocin it reduces stress and anxiety and instils a sense of calm serenity. Exactly what we need, as Empaths, right now.
Although there are several ways in which oxytocin production can be induced, here are some incredible science-backed ways that are super beneficial for an Empath:
1, Aromatherapy Oils
There are three such aromatherapy oils that have been proven to increase oxytocin in the brain: Clary Sage, Geranium and Chamomile.
I use all three and can vouch for their effectiveness, especially for lifting the mood and clearing anxiety and fearful emotions. In fact, they are on my list of essential oils for an Empath.
(When purchasing essential oils always make sure they say 100% pure essential oils.)
2, Take a Bath
Researchers have found that hot environments, warm temperatures and increased sweating activates specific oxytocin-producing parts of the brain. Taking a hot bath is a perfect way to increase body temperature.
A long soak in a hot bath is one of my favourite ways to effortlessly rebalance. Especially when adding my favourite crystals, essential oilsand salt into the mix.
Here is one of my favourite bath time recipes that includes Clary Sage:
The above combination works in so many ways. It helps soothe the emotions. Clary Sage mixed with Lavender works in being both sedative and euphoric. It’s a combination that is soothing to the soul, the senses and the skin. The Hematite works in being grounding. The Amethyst pulsates a powerfully cleansing energy through the bath water which not only clears the aura but also frees the mind of unnecessary thoughts and mind clutter. (When using crystals in water be sure they are water safe. The majority of quartz stones are usually fine.) And the salt is excellent to clear negative energy and restore health for an Empath.
3, Enjoy a Cup of Tea
Drinking herbal teas, such as chamomile, are an easy way to enjoy the herb’s many healing benefits. Chamomile is a medicinal herb that has been traditionally used for its calming and anti-inflammatory properties; it has also been proven to help you produce more oxytocin.
I regularly drink chamomile tea, more so recently, with fresh ginger added. Ginger is a powerful anti-inflammatory herb that has many healing benefits and is particularly good for digestive issues. Simply pop a chamomile tea bag into a mug, add an inch of fresh ginger, and fill with boiling water. Infuse for a minimum of 5 minutes. Enjoy.
5, Boost Your Nutrients
We all require vitamins and minerals in our diet to stay happy and healthy. However, there are three nutrients known to increase oxytocin production in the brain. They are magnesium, vitamin D and vitaminC.
Magnesium is essential for the proper functioning of our nervous system and neurotransmitter activity. Researchers have found that the oxytocin receptor requires magnesium to function properly, and magnesium increases the action of oxytocin at the receptor.
So, basically, if we don’t have enough magnesium, the oxytocin cannot do its work.
Some foods containing magnesium are: dark chocolate, bananas, almonds and avocado.
Vitamin C is another incredible essential nutrient. Researchers have found that vitamin C not only optimizes and increases levels of oxytocin, it also stimulates the secretion of oxytocin. This powerful vitamin, found in many foods especially citrus fruits, also plays many important roles within the body, such as keeping the immune system strong. Vitamin C is also known to decrease stress and improve the mood.
Vitamin D is known as the sunshine vitamin, because the sun is the best source. Research shows that oxytocin is directly activated and controlled by vitamin D. This makes it understandable why so many people suffer with seasonal affected disorder (SAD) during the winter months. Spending twenty minutes a day in the sunshine is a great way to increase the vitamin, but supplements also work.
Getting more of the above nutrients, through diet or supplements, can help boost oxytocin levels. Read more herehow Empaths benefit from supplements and why they are at risk from vitamin and mineral deficiency.
5, Sleep in the Dark
I have written about the importance of Empaths sleeping in the dark, both in books and in articles. Spending time in darkness is important for the production of oxytocin by boosting melatonin.
Melatonin is known as the anti-ageing hormone, produced by the pineal gland (area of third eye) in the darkness. It is an antioxidant and anti-inflammatory and helps prevent, and treat, many illnesses including cancer. Melatonin significantly increases secretion of oxytocin.
Simply keeping the bedroom pitch black, by using black out blinds or curtains, can help boost oxytocin levels.
This post gives an easy way to produce more melatonin and thus oxytocin.
6, Finding Balance
As well as increasing oxytocin, there are several other simple ways to activate the ‘energetic antihistamine effect’ for an Empath. All forms of Grounding will work for protection, but especially Forest Bathing and Earthing. Click on the links to find out more.
I hope you are all keeping well in whatever corner of the world you live.
As I write, the winds are blowing noisily outside and have been for the past day or so. I cannot help but be reminded of the saying ‘The winds of change have begun to blow.’
Here in the UK, we are in our umpteenth week of lockdown. I don’t know how you are all experiencing these crazy days of change, but for me, the further into this time of lockdown we travel, the more I feel the world has changed.
I have got this strange sense inside that I don’t think I’ve ever felt before. Kind of like a weird void. Is it a collective thing?
Now, I realise that as Empaths, we cannot help but pick up on how the collective feels. And yes, the emotional energy levels of late have been amped up beyond anything we’ve endured. But what I’m experiencing doesn’t really feel like the usual collective fear thing. It’s more like a ‘transitional vibe.’ I cannot even begin to explain what it is. It’s as though things are coming to a head.
Some years ago, I shared this post about moving into a new world. In it, I discuss the claims of the late Dolores Cannon about our world splitting into two. The video is below. I recommend watching it. But first go to 1 hour and 34 minutes on the clip where, within a 3-minute window, Dolores discusses what we are currently seeing happening now. Bear in mind she died in 2014.
I know, as humans, we are all supposed to be different. We all have different ideals and beliefs. But the way the world is currently living is like existing in two realities at the same time. Those who see the world one way and those who see it another.
It seems obvious that our governing bodies, those who have lied to us and kept us consuming fear, do not want our world to go into a higher vibration. They want to keep us down and distracted. In fear. And they are going to greater and greater lengths to keep us there.
As I have discussed before, fear energy is all-consuming. It is meant to keep us trapped within irrational thought. At one level this has been done in an attempt to keep our vibration low and our mind’s controlled, but at another, for those who are ready, it helps raise us up.
I believe, at the highest level, we are experiencing this lockdown as a way to help us adapt into the ‘new age or new world.’ We have been given time away from busy schedules or social lives to help us go within and see what changes need to be made.
The shift was always going to be uncomfortable. All the past years of difficulties were also part of our preparation for moving from one ‘world’ to another. This may be our opportunity to begin again, but it also comes with it’s own challenges…
The Precipice
Many of you will be experiencing a ‘precipice of pain,’ where things get worse before they get better. This will come in many guises: confusion, worry, fear, anger, you may even feel like you are going a bit mad, and the levels of anxiety are ‘off the charts.’
Anxiety changes the thought process. It can make you feel incredibly confused, alone and isolated.
When I was twenty, I went to work in Greece. During my first week there, I experienced the worst type of anxiety. I went from thinking I was going to die one minute to feeling like I was going mad the next. I was a stranger to myself. The anxiety created waves of dread and fear that impacted my rational mind in the weirdest ways. However, once I got used to my new life and living experience, the anxiety completely disappeared. I then went on to have the best summer of my life.
The point I am making, by sharing this past story, is that the precipice of change can be the loneliest and scariest place to be. But know, if you are experiencing any type of anxiety or fear it will pass.
We are at the darkest hour before the dawn. Suffering can only be expected. But do not suffer alone.
Suffering in silence will help no one. If you are currently struggling, if you feel alone or that your mental health is impaired there are some things you could be doing.
Talk to Someone
If you feel scared, anxious or isolated, talk to someone, a friend, family member or professional. Our world has never experienced ‘this’ before. Although you are certainly not alone in what you are undergoing, as an Empath you may be experiencing emotions more heightened than most. So, don’t suffer in silence.
If you don’t have anyone to talk to, try a therapist. They may not be in their offices, but many therapists are still working with online or over the phone appointments. Getting worries off your chest is incredibly freeing.
Another option is to simply speak what you are feeling out loud. The load will be lifted and I’m sure someone within the invisible realms will be listening. Doing this also helps take any fear energy out of your head.
Get Out of Your Head
In a recent post, I discussed how beneficial finding silence in a world of noise can be. However, for some, finding silence is not the answer. We are all different and, as I’ve said many times before, what works one day might not work the next. If you find yourself stuck inside your head and meditation doesn’t help, you could try the following:
Tapping: The Tapping technique is known to help with addictions, chronic pain, insomnia, anxiety and for calming persistent thoughts. It is claimed that by tapping the acupressure points, with your fingertips, it activates your body’s innate healing power and helps calm an erratic mind. See this post for details.
Mind Tax: Do something that taxes your mind: crossword puzzles, Sudoku, learn poetry or a language, even for just ten minutes a day. Anything that keeps your mind positively stimulated and distracted will help in preventing your thoughts from going over to the dark side.
Activate human growth hormone (HGH): HGH is a hormone that naturally elevates our moods, raises physical energy and keeps the mind in a more positive space. High intensity interval exercise is one of the easiest ways to help the body release HGH. I have attached a link here to a 20-minute HIIT video on YouTube that can be done by most fitness levels. Just be sure to start slow, at your own level, and build up.
Where Are We Being Taken?
Now, I have to be honest and say I do not know what ‘a new world’ will look like for everyone. I don’t think anyone truly does. Perhaps it will be different for each of us. But I choose to believe that we are experiencing the birthing pains of going from the dark into the light. It is something we have to adapt to. Change is never easy.
The winds of change may thrash us around, but, they also blast the old away. And, like everything else that has blown our way, they will pass. Hopefully, when we re-emerge from our ‘shelters’, we get to decide the path we walk and the life we want to live.
Our surroundings may be quieter than usual, but at times the ‘noise’ of viral emotions can be almost deafening.
In a world overcome with worry and fear, we all benefit from diving into the soothing ‘waters of silence.’ Not only as a retreat from the noise of fear but to reset within ourselves.
Staying in the space of silence, if only for short periods of time, is known to improve memory, stimulate brain growth, relieve stress, combats insomnia, and provides relaxation and respite for the body.
Silence is the perfect remedy to counteract the viral emotions that have infiltrated every area of life. It is both healing and rejuvenating. Not only does silence help reset and still a wired mind, it is also good for balancing our sensory gating process.
Sensory Gating
Wikepdia defines sensory gating as a neurological process of filtering out redundant or unnecessary stimuli in the brain from all possible environmental stimuli.
Sensory gating prevents an overload of irrelevant information in the higher cortical centres of the brain.
Many Empaths experience ‘problems’ with their sensory gating. Sounds can be louder and more irritating, and the many different ‘layers of noise’ in the environment can lead to stress and physical ailments
I liken the Empath’s ability of feeling others’ emotions to a form of sensory gating. Too much sensory information, in the form of emotional energy, works like an influx of noise, proving to be both stress-inducing and exhausting for many. The act of spending time in silence helps to counteract this.
Ten simple ways to access the power of silence:
Here are ten simple ways to benefit from a ‘silence session.’
1. Meditation
Let’s start with the obvious one and the healing technique I always come back to, meditation.
Meditation comes with so many benefits (including many science-backed benefits) from relieving stress to healing physical ailments. It is known to improve all areas of life and helps us become better at everything we do. It also gives us a greater understanding of who we are and where we fit into life.
During these trying times, meditation is something we all benefit from practising, not only for stilling and empowering our mind, but to tune us into our heart centre and higher consciousness.
2. Listen to soft music with ear phones
So, listening to soft music might sound like a contradiction. After all, isn’t music classed as noise? But this is a good method for when your environment is noisy. It cuts off the sound of the outside world and allows for a respite of the mind. The right kind of music can also be healing as well as soothing to the senses. I came across these incredible healing music videos on YouTube here and here.
3. Go into the woods
The sounds of Nature offer the healing benefits of silence. Being around densely populated areas of trees is the perfect way to bask in Nature’s healing stillness. Even better, if you can get close to natural running water it is also purifying (read more here).
If Earthing is practised at the same time, as being out in Nature, it will have double the benefits.
4. Get up early
The quietest time of the day is in the early morning, before the world has woken up. Instead of engaging the brain first thing, by flicking on the TV, radio or checking messages, why not start the day in silence?
Just by sitting in the stillness of a sleeping world it can zone us into the healing vibrations of silence.
5. Take an aromatherapy bath
You may wonder what taking a bath has to do with finding silence, but this is more for silencing the stress sensors. Water is healing in itself, but when an aromatherapy oil is incorporated into the mix, such as Lavender or Chamomile (added to a carrier oil first), it helps turn off the senses engaged by viral emotions.
Essential oils send healing instructions to the limbic system (the system that controls emotions) to relax. They are particularly good to use if you have been experiencing anxiety triggered by external stress. (This post has 11 essential oils beneficial for an Empath).
Light some candles, put a do not disturb sign on the door and immerse yourself for at least twenty minutes (if you live in a noisy house pop your earphones in).
6. Go outdoors after dark
For the most of us, the only time we spend in darkness is when we go to sleep in the evening. But being outdoors at night, in a safe area such as the garden, is particularly good for tuning into silence.
There’s something incredibly stilling and peaceful about the darkened night sky, especially when blanketed with a sweeping of shimmering stars.
If you don’t have a garden, sitting with your eyes open in a darkened room also reaps many benefits.
7. Be at one with your breath
When you fully tune into the breath, by focusing on your inhale and exhale, it helps drown out the noise of the outside world. If you cover your ears at the same time it has an extra benefit.
Try it now and see for yourself. Put your hands over your ears, close your eyes and take 8 to 10 deep breaths. When you remove your hands, you will experience a quieter world than before.
Any type of yogic breathing exercise is also perfect for stilling the mind.
8. Chanting
Again, another one that seems to contradict the idea of finding silence. But, repeating a song-like mantra, such as OM, is not only healing to the body, mind and spirit it helps us find a stillness within.
Chanting is known to purify the environment by creating positive vibrations and filtering out fear energy.
A French physician and auditory neurophysiologist, Dr. Tomatis, believes the ears affect the entire nervous system. He noted how sounds like music or noise, determine physical energy levels and our sense of well-being. He experimented with different music frequencies, noting their effects on humans. By studying Benedictine monks, he observed the healing benefits of chanting. When the monks daily chanting ritual was taken away, for a short period of time, most fell ill. When the singing was reintroduced, they made a full recovery.
9. Get creative
Draw, paint, sing or arrange flowers. Whatever gets your ‘creative juices’ flowing will work.
When the creative mind is kept occupied, by engaging in something that holds the imagination, it tends to switch off from the outside world. Viral emotions and loud sounds get locked out by the ‘lack of sensory engagement.’ This in itself has the benefit of silencing the mind.
10. Turn off the WIFI
We are so connected to the internet in our daily lives, that just by having a WIFI break it helps tune us into the power of silence. It is not until we take a break from the noise of electrical frequencies that we see how they affected our body and mind. This also helps in the respect that when we are constantly bombarded with online information it leads to sensory overload.
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I hope you find this list beneficial and inspires you to tune into the vibration of silence. Even if it’s just for ten minutes a day.
One thing all Empaths will have endured at some point on their journey is a person who behaves in a narcissistic way. For some, however, it is part of their everyday life.
When I use the term narcissist target, in the headline, I am referring to anyone who has been on the receiving end of a narcissist’s attention. This can be via their initial charm through to their lies and manipulation.
But the question has to be, why do Empaths so often end up in the firing line?
One explanation is because of the ‘light’ an Empath carries inside. It’s a light that might be considered, by certain individuals, as a weakness or something that can be controlled. Yet that isn’t the only reason. Before we come to that, we will take a quick peek at the traits of a narcissist.
Traits of a Narcissist
Some of the better-known traits are: high self-esteem, a distinct lack of empathy, excessive self-admiration and a tendency towards selfish or resentful behaviours. But there’s more…
One-sidedness, a manipulative nature, unrealistic expectations of others, an excess need for control, and a huge sympathy deficiency can also fall under the same umbrella. It is these traits that often cause problems for the Empaths.
Why Empaths Attract Narcissists
Over the years, I have discussed the subject of why narcissists attract Empaths and vice versa in other posts and books (here,here, and here). It is my belief that although at opposite ends of the spectrum, both Empaths and narcissists are sensitive people and highly reactive.
Like attracts like. Sensitive attracts sensitive. Yet, one of the biggest reasons why Empaths are so often targeted and end up in the firing line of those with a narcissistic personality is because of their keen observational skills.
The Reflecting Empath
An Empath doesn’t just listen to a person’s dialogue, they observe tone and usage of words, they notice body movements, facial expressions, and they see things that others try to mask. This causes an issue for those who do not want to be ‘seen.’ Particularly when they are hiding something.
A narcissist never wants to be wrong, never wants to be seen as the ‘bad guy’ and wants others to think highly of them. But an Empath often acts like a mirror. Even if they don’t point out the narcissist’s concealed traits verbally, they will be reflected back. (This is discussed more in the Mirror of the Empath.) An Empath reflects truth. They will see it hidden behind any façade, no matter how tightly knitted.
If the finely polished veneer of a narcissist is threatened in any way, especially with exposure, they will attack. They often concoct outlandish stories to discredit an Empath, or anyone who reveals their truth, and blame them for the actions that they carried out themselves. They target those considered a threat.
Generally, a narcissist will not face the truth of who they are, if it makes them appear wrong or in any way a bad person. They convince themselves that it is everyone else who is at fault.
Being Repelled
Even if you have a strong repulsion towards narcissists, and avoid them like the plague, you can still be on the receiving end of their wrath, or end up as a target. Narcissists like to be praised and feel special. They want respect and if they are not shown it, they tend to lash out. If you have bruised a narcissist’s ego, by not giving them the respect they think is deserved, then expect to face a backlash.
The Good News
The good news is that narcissists can work as a catalyst on an Empath’s journey. Although it will not feel like it at the time, but anything that ignites insecurities, emotional injuries, victim mentality or personal challenges, can also push an Empath towards transformation. The darkness reveals the inner light. It encourages us to work on ourselves, which in turn takes us to a higher vantage point.
It is often the case that the more challenges an Empath faces the wiser they become and the greater their understanding of life.
I am certainly not suggesting that constant suffering is the perfect formula for enlightenment, but we come to a point when we understand why we have endured such difficulties. We can then see how they shaped us into becoming better people.
Avoiding Excessive Emotional Reactions
Life really is an obstacle course. It gives rise to many uncomfortable and painful experiences. However, if we have an emotional reaction to everything a narcissist, or anyone else, says or does then we put ourselves on a fast-tracked path to self-destruction.
We have to train ourself out of excessive emotional reactions, avoid wallowing in our own misery and not be tempted into revenge. Not that revenge is ever on an Empath’s radar, but it is very easy to think, ‘I’ll show them.’ Or to have the belief that if I say or do nothing, they are getting away with it. This will just lead to more lies and more attacks. We must not forget there is a greater force than ourselves at work that creates balance… Karma.
KARMA
Having been observing the world for many years, I have seen the law of attraction and karma work over and over. People may seem to get away with treating others atrociously, then, suddenly, karma catches up.
Everything goes around. Karma keeps each of us responsible for our behaviour.
Dealing with the Problem
So, finally, the question is, what can we do about being a narcissist target? Well, one thing is for sure, we will not change the mind of a narcissist, or those who have an over-inflated ego, if it makes them to appear wrong. If they have decided it is us who is at fault, it is unlikely we will get them to admit otherwise. We can only change ourself and our reactions. Take back our power.
The best way to react is with no reaction and don’t be drawn into conflicts designed to pull you down or make you feel bad. Now, when I say react with no reaction, I am not saying lie down and let someone trample all over you. Simply walk away. Avoid feeding your fear or pain by getting upset at the lies they may spread.
When you continuously focus on something or someone your attention feeds the energy. Remember: where your focus goes your energy flows.
Life really is too short to waste your precious time on those who steal your joy and drain your energy.
When you walk away or show no interest in their lies, they move on. The more lives they touch, with manipulative ways, the sooner their truth is revealed.
By avoiding excessive emotional reactions, it also helps keep one’s vibration raised. Yes, I know, easier said than done. But by getting in control of the mind and working to stay grounded, it helps us better control our emotional reactions. (This is where mind-stilling though breathing techniques, meditation and yoga can come in handy.)
Stay in gratitude and it will keep you in a ‘higher space.’ Keep pushing forward! Stay in your light and don’t let anyone extinguish it!
If you have ever experienced a panic attack you will know only too well that they are not something you would wish on anyone. They create the kind of dread and sense of impending doom that are beyond comprehension.
Because Empaths and HSPs feel everything so intensely, it is often the case that they are more prone to experiencing anxiety and panic attacks.
Not Feeling Safe
Going through life over-feeling emotions and the emotional energy of others can create the perception of being unsafe, especially when out in public or around certain people. Feeling unsafe can put the body into fight-or-flight mode which is a response of the sympathetic nervous system. When the body is in fight-or-flight it is in a constant state of stress.
We often experience a sense of not feeling safe when we have experienced past traumas, especially bereavement or physical or emotional abuse, and not dealt with them.
Another issue many Empaths and HSPs face, which can affect our perception of safety, is feeling misunderstood. When we feel misunderstood it often creates an inability to truly connect with others. Which often leads to a sense of isolation, and is a catalyst for repetitive dark thoughts.
Research has shown that negative thought patterns can be inflammatory. They create problems within the body and mind and keep us in trauma mode.
We all have good and bad within us, light and dark. When we are suffering or in pain, as in with anxiety or panic attacks, it is often because we have inadvertently been feeding the darkness. We allow our pain to dictate our lives. That said, we don’t necessarily have to have been suffering to experience panic attacks. Sometimes external factors, certain foods or hormonal changes can be the trigger.
Being aware of triggers, as well as having knowledge of what we can do if we start to suffer with anxiety or panic attacks, can ensure we don’t needlessly suffer. The following are some simple steps to help prevent anxiety…
1. Use meditation and breathing exercises:
Breathing and meditation practices help cultivate more positive thoughts, help balance the stress hormones and instil calm. However, some people find meditation too stressful to perform when experiencing panic attacks or anxiety. The stillness can become unnerving. In these cases, moving meditations, such as yoga with the breath, or deep breathing is massively beneficial.
The Whisky Breath is a quick breathing exercise which can offer instant relief. Simply inhale for a count of four and then exhale for a count of eight. Continue for as long as you need. This exercise switches on the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps to prevent or stop panic attacks. The three-minute meditation performed daily, after doing the Whisky Breath breathing, will help keep the mind positive and anxiety at bay.
There’s more information on breathing exercises and yoga here and here.
2. Keep away from people who make you feel unsafe:
If you don’t feel safe, or have trust issues with certain friends or family members, or if you don’t feel they have your best interest at heart it can cause emotional trauma. It is wise to avoid those who create safety issues for the health of your body and mind, which in turn can prevent anxiety.
3. Check your diet:
Are you eating chemical-laden foods, or foods that are known to trigger autoimmune conditions? Anxiety can sometimes be a warning from your body, telling you to pay attention. If you suspect your diet is activating anxiety or panic attacks, keeping a food diary can help you pinpoint the triggers. Read more on this post.
4. Supplement wisely:
Even with the healthiest of diets it is difficult to know we are getting, or absorbing, a full range of nutrients. We often eat anti-nutrient foods without realising (foods that block or hinder nutrient absorption), which means the good stuff we do take in doesn’t get chance to do its job. Vitamin and mineral deficiency can be a big trigger for anxiety. A basic supplementation regime can help in regards to anxiety and panic attacks. This post gives more info.
5. Take Valerian Root:
Valerian root is a natural herb used for treating anxiety and insomnia. Similar to melatonin, valerian root puts you in relaxed sleepy state. Valerian contains a neurotransmitter called GABA, that is known to have a powerfully calming effect on the mind.
6. Do therapeutic exercise:
Yoga and walking are probably two of the most therapeutic forms of exercise. There is a type of yoga to suit everyone, but it has to be practised regularly to see results. Walking is easy and super beneficial for the body and mind. Also, high intensity exercise, which helps release human growth hormone, can be beneficial for stopping panic attacks.
7. Use crystals:
There are many different types of crystals that can help with anxiety. Rose Quartz in particular is a lovely stone to help with panic attacks. It is a love stone that really helps calm the emotions. When choosing crystals for anxiety it is best to see them in person (instead of ordering online). If gazing on a certain stone makes you feel calm inside it is generally a good choice.
8. Salt therapy:
Taking salt baths can be incredibly calming and soothing for the body and mind. Even better, if you live near an ocean taking a daily dip can work wonders for soothing anxiety. This post gives more details.
9. Check your water levels:
If you are dehydrated, even just a little, it can trigger anxiety and panic attacks. This post gives more information.
10. Reduce wireless air time:
More research is coming to light showing how WIFI is a major cause of anxiety and panic attacks, especially when spending a lot of time wirelessly downloading on the internet (Youtube, etc.). Give yourself a few days away from WIFI and see what effect it has. Switch your phone to aeroplane mode when not in use and limit your time on the internet. This post explains more.
11. Keep your bedroom as a calm zone:
Quality sleep is important for preventing anxiety and panic attacks. Don’t keep electrical gadgets, especially WIFI gadgets, in the bedroom. Keep your bedroom well aired and clean. Use black out curtains to ensure a solid night’s sleep.
12. Use essential oils:
Essential oils are perfect for instilling calm. Lavender being one of the best allrounders, but other good ones are Basil, Chamomile or Geranium. You can normally feel the calming effects of these essential oils within ten minutes of application. Simply massage a few drops, mixed with a teaspoon of oil, into the soles of your feet. Or use them in your bath, add them to your body oils or put a few drops on your pillow before sleep time. Check this post out for more essential oils and their benefits.
13. Avoid caffeine:
Caffeine is one of the worst things for triggering panic attacks and anxiety. It is found in coffee, tea, chocolate and colas. Avoidance will go a long way to keeping anxiety and panic attacks at bay.
14. Avoid stimulants:
Alcohol and recreational drugs can be another big trigger of anxiety. Many people assume alcohol is a relaxant, but it is when the effects wear off that the problems start.
15. Avoid chemicals:
If you are Sensitive, it often means you will be sensitive to chemicals in products and scents, which can trigger many unusual physical reactions and stress within the body. Keep your products as natural as possible, including laundry detergent, household cleaning products and personal hygiene products.
16. Listen to soothing sounds:
There are some incredibly soothing sounds that can help reduce anxiety and prevent panic attacks. Ocean sounds, angelic harmonies, thunderstorms, gentle chimes, etc. are incredibly calming to the body and mind. Try to avoid live music downloads (such as on Youtube) as the WIFI can trigger more anxiety. Perhaps buy a CD and listen through headphones.
17. Don’t eat late at night:
Eating late at night can be the trigger for sleep anxiety and panic attacks. Try to have your last meal at least three hours before bedtime to ensure it is digested.
18. Get out in Nature:
This is a perfect remedy for anxiety and panic disorder. Even listening to the birds singing is beneficial. Read more here on the benefits of nature for an Empath.
19. Massage and reflexology:
Massaging body treatments work wonders for helping with anxiety, especially reflexology, which works on the reflex points on your feet. Schedule in time for yourself and book in a weekly treatment to help soothe your body and mind.
20. Talk to a specialist:
If you know you have supressed past trauma such as a bereavement, emotional or physical abuse, or unresolved issues, it might help to talk to a trained therapist. Supressed trauma is often reignited in times of stress, which often triggers panic attacks.
21. Have your hormones checked:
This is a big one, especially for women. If you are going through any kind of hormonal transition, such as perimenopause or menopause, it can be a big trigger for panic attacks. Perimenopause often starts from the late thirties onwards and can create many unusual and uncomfortable physical and mental symptoms.
So, there you go. Hopefully, you will have found something on the list that will help if you suffer with anxiety or panic attacks. But even if you don’t suffer with anxiety now, it is always good to have this page bookmarked for future reference. Anxiety can be triggered at any point in life, sometimes with no known cause. Having a reminder of what steps to take to combat panic attacks can avoid a lot of unnecessary suffering.
I noted in my last quick post that I had been a couple of weeks without WIFI in December, and what a positive impact it had on me. It is quite incredible how dependent we have become on the internet for everything. So much so, it is difficult to imagine life without it. But have we really considered what effect all the electromagnetic fields (EMFs) are having on our Empath sensitivities?
In this last post, I discussed how many Empath lives are disrupted by sensory overload. Another massive factor which also contributes to this overload are electromagnetic fields (EMFs) which include WIFI.
Electromagnetic Pollution
Over the years, the use of smart phones and laptops has skyrocketed. Even the ‘untechiest’ person will have a mobile phone. It certainly doesn’t help that the majority of our phones are also connected wirelessly to the internet which gives off considerable amounts of EMFs when data is streamed.
This increase in mobile phone use has also led to the need for more cell towers around our towns and cities, which means greater levels of EMF in our environment.
Wireless gadgets are not the only problem. There are many other devices within the home that allow these invisible frequencies to build up; such as televisions, fluorescent lighting, microwave ovens, etc.
EMF and the Empath
EMFs are so powerful they can be measured.
You and me, we both create electromagnetic fields. Virtually every single process which keeps us alive can be traced back to an electric field. A giant electric field holds all our atoms together. We wouldn’t be able to function without our electric fields. Every time we move a muscle, we create an electric field. We are electrical beings.
Think about walking into a room full of angry people where the atmosphere could be ‘cut with a knife.’ It wouldn’t be long before you were affected by the EMF of the room (whether you were an Empath or not), via the merging of electrical fields. No matter how happy you were prior to entering an angry room, the electrical energy of others can influence your own energy and thus your mood.
‘Every atom has its own electric field, and when you put two atoms close together, they can mess around with the electric field of the other.’ Jack FrazerMaster’s Physics Oxford University
The above quote explains why the energy of one person can impact the energy of another. Our electric fields like to ‘mingle.’ It also shows that frequencies emitted by WIFI can ‘mess around’ with our own.
One electric field affects the way another functions. So, if you experience strange symptoms, or if your Empath traits are making life difficult, it could be caused by EMF.
Maybe it is time to pay attention to how you feel after spending a lot of time on wireless networks.
As Empaths we easily recognise the impact of the energy of people but many of us are also affected by the electromagnetic frequencies emitted within our environment without realizing.
Hazards to Health
EMF disrupt energy frequencies within our body and within our energy field, they affect our chakras and endocrine glands, immune system and nervous system. In fact, the symptoms of enduring too much EMFs are similar to those an Empath might experience from being ungrounded.
Here’s a Sampling:
Dark moods, depression or emotional overwhelm
Difficulty concentrating and trouble giving attention to anything which requires focus
Brain fog and memory loss
Anxiety, panic attacks and irritability
Fatigue and lack of motivation
Dizziness
Sleeplessness (even though exhausted)
How Do You Know If You’re Affected?
One of the best ways to find out if you are EMF sensitive is to have an electrical detox. Which I must admit can be a challenge because let’s face it, electrical gadgets are everywhere. Perhaps spend a few days away from all things electrical or just turn off the electricity in your home for a while and see how it affects you. Even just switching your phone setting to aeroplane mode, when not in use, will make a difference.
I personally found that when I was not using my phone and laptop for two weeks my brain became clearer, my thoughts more lucid and I felt more energised. Others report of feeling generally happier and healthier or having strange symptoms clear up.
The Solution
Sadly, continuous escapism of EMF and WIFI, in this modern world, is virtually impossible. Yet there is one simple thing we can do to help protect ourselves. Use crystals.
EMF Shielding
Certain crystals can act like bioelectrical shields against EMF. Not surprisingly, the crystals that work best for EMF protection are the stones we use for grounding.
Crystals to Use:
Ferromagnetic crystals (containing iron) are best for EMF protection. There are several of them, but my favourites are:
Hematite
Black Tourmaline
Shungite
If you have been impacted by electromagnetic frequencies, you will likely notice the difference as soon as you use one of the above grounding stones.
Other stones that can also be used are Pyrite and Magnetite (although I have never tried them myself, others have reported them to work).
How To Use Crystals for EMF Protection:
When using grounding crystals, such as Black Tourmaline, for EMF protection the goal is to create a shielding barrier between you and your wireless devices. The best ways to do this are:
Put them in your trouser/shirt pocket or wear them as jewellery such as necklace or bracelet.
Place them in between you and your devices. Perhaps on your work desk.
After Use
It is not always possible to keep a crystal on hand. In some cases, we need to use them after EMF exposure. They can be used with good results in the following ways:
Use your grounding crystal in meditations: Hold your crystal, or crystals, in your hands and keep your mind focused on their energy during your meditation.
Place a grounding crystal on the third eye (centre of forehead) for five to ten minutes: This helps with clearing any brain fog caused by EMF.
Use grounding crystals around your bath tub: (Not in water, as some crystals may rust). This not only helps clear EMFs; it also makes bath time a much fizzier and cleansing affair.
When using crystals for EMF protection there are two IMPORTANT THINGS to remember:
Powerfully magnetic crystals should not be used near your laptop or external hard drives because they could fry them.
Being semiconductors of energy, Clear Quartz (or other silicate crystals) should not be used near electronic devices, as they can amplify the EMFs
Extra EMF Protection
Although certain crystals work wonders for EMF shielding, we can also take further steps to protect ourselves. The simplest ways are to turn off your wireless routers at bedtime, don’t keep your mobile or other electrical devices on your body, keep your phones and laptops out of your bedroom, and switch off electrical appliances at the mains when not in use.
Also, as was mentioned in my last post, get out in Nature as much as possible. Nature heals us on so many levels and is the perfect protection from EMF. Read more here on the benefits of being in Nature for an Empath.
Remaining vigilant of what might weaken us as Empaths helps ensure we live our happiest and healthiest life. Knowledge is power. Hopefully, this post has shed some light as to how you might have been affected by EMF. We live in an ever-changing fast-paced world that seems to bring in more challenges by the day. Levels of electromagnetic pollution are bound to get worse, so taking some simple steps now to prevent overload can go a long way.
If you are interested in learning more about how crystals can help you as an Empath, I will be releasing a book on the subject in early spring.
Hope that you have all recovered from the festive period and here’s to a fantastic 2020!
(Part of the above information has been lifted from my upcoming book – Crystal Healing for the Empath – scheduled for release early spring.) Crystal Healing for the Empath Diane Kathrine
To some loud energy may seem like a weird concept. But not to an Empath. An Empath will immediately know what is meant by loud energy and why we often need to find ways to shelter from it.
As Empaths, we become adept at differentiating levels of energy. We even become proficient at knowing what someone will feel like just by observing them from a distance. I often think we measure a person’s energy in a similar way that we measure sound. And just like sound can be interpreted as being loud, so can someone’s energy. (I’m sure you have experienced wanting to ‘shush’ someone even though they have not said a word.)
It is often the case that the livelier a person the louder their energy. However, someone can still have loud energy without necessarily being a loud person. There are several factors that seem to raise a person’s ‘vibrational volume’ and they are:
Being in quiet emotional pain (suffering in silence).
Grasping for attention or being super self-absorbed.
Being famous (although this energy can be quite enigmatic).
Containing anger or resentments.
Having loud energy is certainly no crime and we cannot build resentments towards someone just because of their ‘energetic decibels.’ But, just like persistent loud noises can impact our health and wellbeing, so can loud energy.
Sensory Overload
You may yourself have noticed that on some occasions you are not affected by the noisy energy of a person, but at other times it winds you up to the point of distraction. This often happens when there’s been a sensory overload. If all your senses have been on overload you won’t handle a person’s loud energy as well as you should.
We talk about being sensitive to other people’s energy, but that’s not all we can be sensitive to. Many Empaths have heightened senses. We hear sounds louder, see colours brighter and taste foods more intensely. We also suffer more with food sensitivities which also contributes to heightened senses.
It is often when all our senses are on overload that we cannot handle the loud energy of people. And is another reason why Empaths don’t do well spending a lot of time in places that are loud or filled with lots of people.
Sensory overload can trigger: fatigue, mood swings, people irritation, and more.
If we become irritated when around another person, we often blame it on their energy, but it might just be that it was ‘the straw that broke the camel’s back.’ In other words, all our other senses have become so heightened that we cannot take any more ‘input.’
The thing is when we are overloaded it causes unnecessary stress to the body and mind. We then get caught up in a vicious cycle of energy overload and our senses never get a rest.
Now, as nice as it would be to ask someone to contain their energy, this obviously isn’t an option. We need ways to filter and cleanse our senses so that we don’t get taken down by sensory overload.
I often talk about the importance of grounding for an Empath, which is not just great for ‘energy protection’ it also works as an easy way to rebalance or calm our senses.
Nature
Getting outdoors into the natural world is one of the top ways of grounding. Nature is so soothing to the body, mind and soul. Sadly, the green spaces in and around our cities are getting less and less. Houses, apartment blocks and business units are being built on every available piece of land. This has more impact on our general wellbeing than we probably realize. (Read more about Nature’s healing power here.)
My husband and I do a lot of travelling around the UK. Mostly down south on the M6. But we also go up to Scotland. When we drive towards London, we don’t pass much greenery and we often arrive at our destination lethargic and agitated. However, when driving up to Scotland the opposite is true. We often feel uplifted. If you have done any driving through the UK (or any other place where you go from city to greenery) you might have also experienced this yourself. The further North you travel, on the M6 in the UK, the greener it becomes. The landscape is beautiful and calming to gaze upon. It is soothing to the senses. And that is without even getting out of the car.
Although I know the volume of traffic plays a part in draining our energy when travelling (south-bound on the M6 is particularly busy), we have also sat in traffic heading towards Scotland and it by no means has the same effect.
So, yes, to protect from sensory overload, get out in Nature as much as possible. Keep plants and flowers in the house and garden. Even potted herbs dotted around the kitchen will help bring Nature indoors.
If you don’t get chance to get outdoors much, never fear, there are other fab ways to help soothe the senses and they are:
Meditative Breathing
Before and after going to busy places use meditative breathing exercises for a couple of minutes or longer. A good one to use is the 4/7/8 breathing technique. Inhale for 4 beats, hold for 7 beats, exhale for 8 beats. This practice is soothing to all senses and helps protect from loud energy.
Buzzing bee breath is another great technique to use. Simply close your eyes, plug in your ears with your fingers, inhale and, keeping the mouth closed, exhale whilst making the sound of a buzzing bee. (See more here.)
Crystals
Carrying or wearing grounding crystals, such as Hematite or Black Tourmaline, are perfect for protection. These stones not only help protect you from loud energy, they are also soothing to the emotions and help keep you grounded. (More on crystals coming soon.)
Aromatherapy
A great way to soothe your senses and bring all-round calm is by using aromatherapy oils. Before going to peopled places, put some lavender on a hanky and breathe it in when ‘overloaded.’ Or use essential oils in the bath after an energy overload. (Here’s a post to get you started.)
It is also a good idea to avoid overly potent chemical smells (car fumes, air fresheners, cleaning products, soaps, perfumes and deodorants, etc.), which can also overload the senses.
Music
The right type of music, or sounds, can work wonders for soothing your senses and protecting from loud energy. Take your ear phones and Ipod (do people still use these?) or other device and listen to soothing or uplifting music when in places where there is a lot of sensory stimuli.
Eye Cupping
Too much visual stimuli can be overloading. A simple way to soothe your sight sense is eye cupping. Rub your hands together to warm them up, then place your palms over your eyes. Open your eyes into the dark warmth of your palms for as longs as needed (only perform when safe to do so).
So, there you go. Hopefully you will have some new inspiration of what to try to prevent sensory overload and to protect from loud energy. (If you’re looking for more this post might help.)
In my next post I will be addressing a massive factor that is responsible for causing Empath overwhelm and sensory overload. Be sure to look out for it.
Hope you’re all keeping well in your little corners of the world.
The answer to the above question is yes. An Empath really can feel the emotions of others.
The problem is we don’t always know how it makes us react.
What I mean by this is, the emotional energy of those we come into contact with can have a huge impact; not only on how we feel but on how we behave. It can push us towards being more introverted than what is natural, it can trigger insecurities or even make us feel unwell.
How Does an Empath Know How to Interpret Emotional Energy?
Interpreting emotional energy is a tricky area. We can so easily misconstrue what we feel. I know I certainly have with different people over the years.
In my teen years I had a friend who, for the purpose of this post, I will call Sarah. I met Sarah at high school. She came from a broken home. But nothing in her outward persona gave off insecurities about her parents’ divorce. She was a bright vivacious girl. Sarah was popular, good at sport and academically minded. And although she did not seem affected by the breakdown of her parents’ marriage, the way she felt to me told another story (I just didn’t know it at the time).
I didn’t know Sarah when her parents split, so I cannot attest to how she was prior to the breakup. But, whenever I was with her, I felt insecure and unstable. At the time I assumed it was ‘just me’ and my own teenage insecurities that made me feel awful when in her presence.
I continued to hang out with Sarah, along with my other friends, after school and into my late teens. But I never enjoyed spending time alone with her. In fact, she used to comment on how quiet I was when it was just the two of us. But I couldn’t help it, I felt myself freeze up when with her.
In her late teens, Sarah ended up getting into the ‘rave/drug scene,’ which was so popular in the late eighties and early nighties here in Manchester. From there she very quickly went downhill. Her childhood trauma evidently caught up with her, which was quickly heightened by her drug use. I would get early morning phone calls off her, telling me that she was frightened and needed to talk immediately. When I turned up at her home, she would not acknowledge the phone call or admit there being a problem. If I tried to talk to her about it, she would quickly change the subject.
Because of her lifestyle choice, Sarah drifted from me and my group of friends. Within a couple of years, Sarah’s mind was no longer her own. She became mentally unstable and was in and out of mental health units.
I lost touch with Sarah many years ago. I have heard through the grapevine that she is still a troubled soul and a shadow of her former ‘happy-go-lucky’ teenage self.
At the time, I may not have understood what I felt in Sarah, but I can still remember how it impacted me. She may have hidden from her pain, but it was loud and clear for me to feel. It gave me a sense of feeling insecure and awkward.
Hidden Pain
Another example of my sensing hidden pain which I didn’t understand in another is with someone who I will refer to as Mrs Smith. I was probably in my twenties, with no real understanding of my Empath ways, when I first encountered Mrs Smith. I remember feeling particularly uncomfortable with her, but in a different way than I had felt with Sarah. The memory of which has also stayed with me for many years.
I have attended the same gym, on and off, since my twenties. It is the type of gym, like many others, where you know people’s faces but don’t know their names or their backstories, and it was here where I first encountered Mrs Smith, when we were paired up in a yoga class:
The best way I could describe Mrs Smith’s energy, on my first encounter with her, was as a self-absorbed vibe. I wasn’t sure why but I did not enjoy being in her presence. I remember back then that she was sometimes arrogant and acted like she was the only person in the room worthy of the teacher’s attention. I felt naturally repelled by her. Over the years, as I came and went from the gym, our paths rarely crossed, until I started doing classes regularly again.
On my first re-encounter, I remember being stood in the studio, waiting for the class to start, when Mrs Smith came behind me. I immediately reacted. All I can say is I felt rage inside. I wanted to get away from her because the feelings I experienced were so unbearable (which also made me feel guilt for wanting to escape her). I didn’t remember feeling ‘this bad’ with her before.
The thing is, Mrs Smith looked happy. She chatted to others in the class and made her presence known. From the outside you would never think anything untoward was going on. But every time I came close to her, if only in passing, I was engulfed with a sense of dread or rage. By this point I knew I was an Empath and I recognised that I was feeling her energy. It was so potent that it was hard for me to block it or distract myself.
I didn’t even have to see Mrs Smith to feel her energy, it would wash over me like a dark gloom, even when she was out of eyeline.
When I don’t know them personally, I sometimes find that by making eye contact with people, who trigger emotional reactions within me, it has the effect of lessening the impact. But as Mrs Smith never looked my way, often breezing by me like I was invisible(this is common when those in pain come near an Empath see this post to learn more), all I could do was quietly inch myself away.
Sadly, a couple of years ago, Mrs Smith committed suicide.
Everyone who knew Mrs Smith at the gym were shocked by how she could do such a thing. They had no idea that she was in such a dark place. But facts emerged about her life after her passing, that she had not shared with others, which explained her story. It also explained why I felt such rage in her presence. It was a very sad ending to a life of pain.
When an Image Does Not Reflect the Truth
I could go on with examples of how people have affected me emotionally, and how an ‘image’ does not always reflect the truth. A smile can hide deep pain. Arrogance can hide an incredible lack of self-worth.
Humans are good at concealing insecurities and their inner turmoil, but an Empath will always feel them.
When engulfed by negative emotions, after being around a certain person, it doesn’t mean the other is a bad person. We are often just picking up on what the person feels about themselves or about life.
Is there a Solution?
So, the question is what we should do when we feel toxic emotions in another. Should we intervene or avoid?
When people hide from themselves, or are in denial of their past, there is not a lot we can do to help them. If they are not ready or willing to confront their insecurities or ‘shadow,’ they will unlikely want others to acknowledge them either.
A Few Kind Words
Self-protection is important. Sometimes staying away from those who trigger uncomfortable feelings is the best and only option. However, there are ways we can make a difference to those in hidden emotional pain, without doing too much damage to our own emotional health, by offering a few kind words.
Words of self-encouragement or just simple friendliness can go a long way. Not only in changing the way the other feels to us, but also in how they feel about themselves (if only briefly).
We can be inclined to avoid those who make us feel bad, but sometimes briefly making contact actually helps them and us. It can have the effect of ‘breaking the emotional connection,’ and distracts us from what we feel.
Some might find it better to mentally send ‘positive vibes’ instead. It really depends on how the energy of another affects you and your mind.
Of course, this is a broad subject with many different scenarios. But it is always good to have different approaches to survive in different situations.
Please feel free to share examples of how you cope when around people who carry ‘uncomfortable energy’ in the comments below.
A couple of posts ago, I discussed how an Empath is often painted as the villain. Today, I want to discuss a similar subject but from another perspective: The Empath’s shadow side.
The shadow side may sound like something devious that drives a person to do dark and dastardly deeds; but it is mostly the source of great emotional pain, especially within an Empath.
What is an Empath’s Shadow Side?
Basically, a shadow side within an Empath is the same as within anyone else: it is the unresolved issues, emotional pain and insecurities, buried deep within, that can affect our behaviour and outlook on life. The side we don’t always know how to deal with.
I also mentioned in my last post how many Empaths are continually working on themselves to become healthier, happier and all-round better people. The shadow side, however, is often the last thing we want to address.
It is in the things that hurt us or that which we hide from where we will find our shadow.
Most of us have a side that we keep hidden from the rest of the world and even from ourselves. Hiding from our shadow side could be likened to wearing a mask, to conceal something that we consider either too ugly to be seen or too painful to be confronted.
The Japanese believe that everyone has three faces: The face we show the world, the face we show our family and close friends, and the face we show no one. It is our hidden face which is our truest reflection and hides our deepest discomforts. Wearing a mask, to conceal one’s shadow side, is the way many live and is often considered the norm.
Revealing the Cause
A good way to reveal the shadow is looking at what hurts you most. Is it rejection or not being accepted? Could it be people taking advantage of your kind nature? or perhaps not being able to connect with others? Whatever it is, you will generally find the origins of this hurt in your childhood.
Sensitive people are impacted their whole life by the inconsiderate or cruel behaviour of certain individuals from their childhood: The school bully, an angry teenage sibling, an unaware teacher, etc. If something cruel and uncalled for was said or done to you as a child, a seed was planted, creating the roots of the shadow to build.
Hiding from one’s truth may seem like a contradiction on the part of an Empath. Especially considering that most Empaths tend to detest inauthenticity. Wouldn’t hiding a part of ourselves be classed as living in an inauthentic way…? Yes and no.
There is a good reason an Empath may hide the truth of themselves from certain people, and it’s not always to get them to like us.
When we awaken as an Empath, a new way of life is gradually revealed. Not only do we come to embrace and appreciate our unusual traits – traits that set us apart from others – but we start experiencing more synchronicities, we develop greater intuition and discover a new outlook. Everything we have experienced when around people, emotionally and physically, finally makes sense. We understand our need for time alone, why we feel crazy energy when in busy places, and why we experience overpowering emotions when with certain persons. We also come to understand the deeper layers of human nature.
Once awake, we see that most people only see things from their own perspective. The majority don’t have the ability to see the world in 3D, like many Empaths do, and therefore cannot get on board with our way of thinking or relate to the experiences we endure. Because of this awareness, we become vigilant of protecting our space and are hesitant of opening up… We also don’t like burdening others with our troubles.
One thing the ‘Empath Awakening’ doesn’t do is take away our woes. In some cases, we become more sensitive and feel emotions more intensely. We thus hide from our shadow side to protect ourselves from experiencing more pain.
The truth is, avoidance just prolongs the discomfort.
Humans are hardwired into avoiding pain. It is a form of self-protection. ‘Escapism of feeling’ is often done through suppressants such as food, alcohol or drugs, etc.
This never works.
Suppressants just numb or mask the pain for a while. They act like a distraction; taking our attention away from that which needs addressing.
Confrontation
Some believe that by confronting their shadow-side it will cause too much heartache; hoping that avoidance will offer the ‘easier ride’. Which is understandable.
Sadly, when we choose the ‘easy route’ in life, it rarely turns out to be the comfortable journey we wanted, especially when we are avoiding doing something we know we should do.
One of the simplest ways to face the shadow side is by admitting to our insecurities, or that which hurts us.
Admitting that we have been hurt by our past and that we are ready to let it go brings the pain out of the shadows. When facing our ‘inner-demons’, we work to take away their power.
That said, it is not always possible to remove all the buried pain of the shadow side. Some pain is hardwired and is part of us for a reason. It shapes us in many ways; allowing us to empathize at a deeper level.
When we accept that ‘emotional pain’ has a purpose on this journey and is not just some unfair burden that we were unfortunate enough to be saddled with, it can lessen the impact.
Calming the Shadow
Another aspect of working towards balance is to avoid anything which unnecessarily activates ingrained mood-memories created by the shadow.
Mood-memories are the go-to moods, initially activated by the pain body, that we hang out in when feeling low or when in a dark mental space. I find two of the biggest triggers being diet and people (and hormone fluctuations).
Diet
By eating foods that influence the hormones in a negative way, it not only lowers our vibration and slows us down, it also impacts moods. This has bearings on wellbeing and initiates dark emotions to be roused or remembered. Wheat and sugar being two of the biggies (read more here). Meat also plays its part with many Empaths (this post explains more).
Uncovering food triggers is an essential part of preventing activation of mood memory.
People
The type of people who become pain prompters for an Empath are those who hide their truth and pretend to be something they’re not. Basically, anyone who lives a big lie. Not just by lying to themselves, in hiding from their pain, but lying in their words, actions and energy. Those who hurt others with their disregard and those who hide their shadow behind their ego can act like triggers (read more here).
Just by spending too much time in the presence of anyone who carries the above traits could activate mood-memories.
Face the Pain
Facing hidden emotional pain frees us from living in its shadow.
Self-confrontation may seem like a scary option, but it is one of the best ways to release the emotional shackles of the shadow. If we have hidden insecurities, we continue to suffer, and we continue to draw to us those who play on these weaknesses (law of attraction).
The shadow side offers incredible lessons and serves us in many ways; but until we face it or at least admit to it, our actions and emotions are determined by its sway rather than by our conscious choice.
I will be discussing this subject from another perspective in my next post, so be sure to look out for it.
As I’m sure your already more than aware, being an Empath certainly comes with its challenges. One such thing is suffering with heightened sensitivities, like allergies and intolerances.
For many, having sensitivities tends to go hand-in-hand with Empath life. However, at a certain age you may find these sensitivities heighten and go into overdrive.
There are many reasons for this, but mostly it is down to a compromised immune system and shifting hormones. These changes are normally experienced from the mid-thirties onwards.
Sadly, with age, our bodies become less resilient to all kinds of stress, which means allergies and intolerances start having a greater impact.
The main difference between an allergy and an intolerance is that an allergy is triggered by the immune system, whereas an intolerance may or may not involve an immune system response. Intolerances can also trigger autoimmune reactions, where the immune system attacks the tissues of the body.
Allergic reactions show up straight away, whereas intolerances may not happen for anything up to a day or two after exposure… This is the same for being ‘peopled’. The effects of being ‘peopled’ may be experienced straight away or not for 24 hours or more…
Many Empaths have intolerances that they know of, but you may have become intolerant to something or someone and not even be aware of it.
If you are in contact with something on a daily basis that you are allergic or intolerant to, you tend to have a continuous, albeit sometimes minor, reaction. For example: you may suffer with a constant stuffy nose, itchy eyes, muscle or joint discomfort, lethargy or headaches; but because the symptoms seem minor, you give little thought to them.
Most of us already know what we should or shouldn’t consume. We get that nagging feeling that something is not a fit. But when sensitivities heighten with age, we may start reacting to things we have come into daily contact with for most of our life (including certain people), and therefore not make the connection.
So, you may now be wondering what types of reactions you could experience. Here’s a brief breakdown:
If you drink alcohol, you may find yourself getting intoxicated ridiculously easily and feel so ill after consumption that you believe you’re going to die. Hangovers last for days or even a week. This shows your body is not able to process alcohol like it did, and it’s time to eliminate or drastically reduce your intake.
After eating meat, poultry or fish you feel more depressed than normal and your energy levels plummet. Some Empaths feel the energy of an animal when they consume its flesh, which can cause depression; but also the chemicals and hormones injected into meat can cause a reaction that gets worse with age.
Your morning coffee starts giving you the jitters, making you anxious and/or nauseous. Many Empaths find their tolerance for caffeine decreases with age.
The day after spending time with a certain person you feel fatigued and depressed.
When coming into contact with air fresheners, cleaning products, perfumes or garden chemicals, your nose starts streaming and you develop cold-like symptoms.
Consuming anything genetically modified triggers a host of uncomfortable symptoms for days after.
White sugar or wheat products makes your body lethargic and your mind race.
Watching TV or spending time on the internet gives you brain fog and makes you feel restless or irritable.
You may find you put on weight, for no reason, which you cannot get rid of.
As Empath life already has enough challenges to deal with, you don’t want to endure any unnecessary suffering. So, if you find your sensitivities have heightened towards people, or anything else, it is a good idea to keep a lifestyle diary. Write down what you eat, chemicals you may have come into contact with in cleaning products or other, list the people you spend time with, whether you have reactions to hair dyes or beauty treatments, and make a note of time spent in front of a computer, TV or other media outlets, (for women make a note of your monthly cycle).
By keeping notes it will eventually reveal a pattern, and help you make the connection between how you feel and what you’ve come into contact with. It also helps you determine what is triggering or heightening your sensitivities.
One of the best ways to determine an intolerance or allergy is a process of elimination: To withdraw from your life, for a time, the suspected trigger and then reintroduce it after three to four weeks. If you have become intolerant you normally have a big reaction when its reintroduced (this even works with people). If you have a negative physical or emotional reaction it is probably time to eliminate the trigger.
Here are some other posts you might find helpful for determining physical weaknesses that may have developed over the years: Here, Here and Here.
Discover how the traits of an Empath impact the way you live and how to make the most of them…
EMF and the Empath
This increase in mobile phone use has also led to the need for more cell towers around our towns and cities, which means greater levels of EMF in our environment.
The Solution
It is not always possible to keep a crystal on hand. In some cases, we need to use them after EMF exposure. They can be used with good results in the following ways:
The thing is when we are overloaded it causes unnecessary stress to the body and mind. We then get caught up in a vicious cycle of energy overload and our senses never get a rest.
Empaths Empowered 