How would you describe yourself, introvert or extrovert?
Many Empaths identify with being an introvert, for the reason that introversion tends to go hand-in-hand with an Empath’s journey. But that’s not to say there are no extrovert Empaths.
If you started life exhibiting more extrovert ways, the way the world makes you ‘feel’ can trigger or build introvert leanings, such as: a regular need for solitude, not enjoying spending time around people, experiencing social aggravation when around crowds, etc.
Did you know that nearly 75% of the world are extroverts? So, if you consider yourself to be an introvert Empath you are a minority and that is something to be celebrated. But even if you consider yourself to be extrovert, you may also carry many introvert tendencies.
Sadly, many Empaths, or those who sit in between the spectrum of introvert and extrovert as an ambivert, often feel that their introvert ways can hold them back in life.
Generally speaking, most Empaths go through a stage of excessive introversion at some point in their life, especially around times of awakening, spiritual development or major life transitions (extreme introversion can also be a sign of major imbalance or even nutrition deficiency, please see this post for more information), it tends to be part of their path of evolvement. Introvert ways also become more clear with age.
Having introvert traits, in this extrovert-driven world, often brings challenges and hurdles to overcome. So much so, it can leave many Empaths feeling out-of-place, as though they’ve been dumped into a reality where the rules have been written for everyone else. It’s a world where fitting in with social expectations often means living a lie.
There is so much pressure to show extrovert ways, both in the workplace and in social situations, that many introverts are having to ‘fake it’ in order to ‘fit in’.
But, if there’s one thing an Empath dislikes its having to pretend (unless they’re actors up on stage) or act in a way that does not represent their truth. They do not like to conform and they do not like having to live a lie by changing their true behaviour to appease others.
Many introvert Empaths prefer not to be the centre of attention and often dislike networking, small talk and fake friendliness. But as this is an expected way to progress in the modern world it can leave a number of Empaths at odds with themselves.
Some may believe their lack of social skills is down to shyness, but there is much difference between being shy and being introvert.
Although some introverts can be shy, that is not always the reason they do not like excess social interaction.
Shyness is born from a fear: a fear of judgement or social rejection and experiencing social anxiety when interacting with others. An introvert can happily engage others in conversation (when not drained or overwhelmed) at social events, they just don’t like having the pressure to do so if it’s not what they want. They prefer to observe a room rather than work it. And as an Empath can become easily overwhelmed by the dichotomy of energies produced by large groups, social engagements can be a thing of dread.
Their dislike of conforming to social expectations can make others consider the introvert Empath to be antisocial or stuck up. They may also come across as being intimidating.
Most extroverts do not understand an introvert’s quietness and need for solitude or why they prefer to engage with a small group of trusted friends as opposed to a larger group.
The thing is, an introvert prefers to be on the outside of a group and not in the heart of it, they like to listen and observe as opposed to taking centre stage, especially when with people they are not overly familiar with.
It is understandable to see why an Empath may consider introvert mannerisms to hold them back in life. But they’re really quite an asset to have.
Although it may take a while to learn that far from holding you back, introvert ways can propel you forward and take you to places you never imagined possible.
Most introvert Empaths are philosophical and creative, having an active right-brain, they also tend to be spiritual, intuitive and see the bigger picture without being shown. Their creativity and deep-thinking leads to some incredible concepts and opportunities.
Quiet, reflective time, away from people and distraction, is essential for the Empath’s creative mind to flourish. Solitude and self-reflection is all part of this path.
It should also be noted that, as an Empath, it really helps to recognise the energy of other people’s judgements and opinions. The introvert Empath often feels the social expectations and judgements of the extrovert population, which they may then interpret as their own. This can lead them to feeling pressure to be more socially engaging or it could cause a contradiction with their own true inner-traits.
One of the most important things an Empath can do is learn to discern the energy they feel and determine where it is coming from (see this post for more information on how to discern the energy of others). Too many take on what they think is their own emotions and feelings and wrongly interpret them. Especially those who came to discover later in life of their Empath abilities.
The introvert Empath needs to spend time in deep contemplation. It’s their time to figure out life and its many complexities. It is during their quiet time that they get the answers they are looking for. This may be seen as self-indulgent, anti-social or unfriendly, but these introvert ways are priceless gifts when it comes to creativity and uncovering life-paths.
While society will probably continue to make an introvert Empath feel like an outcast or an oddball, knowing it’s ok not to give in to peer pressure, to ‘fit in’, is liberating in so many ways. It opens a whole other dimension for the Empath and gives them the freedom to live authentically and find their truth.
Truth lies within us all. Part of our journey is uncovering that truth!
Hope this helps on your journey.
Until next time,
11 thoughts on “How Do You Know If You’re An Introvert Empath?”
Thank you for this, it was much needed. I’m at a point in my life where I’m starting to feel the pressure of being an introvert. Sometimes I question it and think my introversion is bad and I should be out there ‘doing everything everyone else is doing’ even if it’s so not me. I’ve been trying to figure out what’s wrong with me, clearly this is my fault! I’m doing something wrong with this living thing. Why am I so weird and awkward? A question I ask myself daily. You answered a lot of questions about how I’ve been feeling lately. Thanks again, this was very helpful.
I have just realized why I have felt at odds with the label Asperger’s syndrome being hypothetically applied to many members of my family due to one of my nephews being diagnosed with it through his school, and many members of my family suffered the same traits & worse, including myself.
Asperger’s syndrome is on the Autistic spectrum and I wouldn’t say that my nephew or any other member of my family was autistic.
WE ARE ALL ALL EMPATHS! Diagnosed at last! WHAT A BLESSED RELIEF!
You keep describing me and all the time I thought that they were Asperger’s traits.
I like people and I am very friendly but I’ve had to work very hard to appear ‘normal’ while keeping my own counsel.
Interesting information. I feel like my spiritual path separates me from others. I think deeply about my spiritual path and purpose. I find it difficult to find others who want to think that deeply about the creator and life purpose. This leaves me having what I call “surface” conversations with people that leave me unfulfilled with my relationships. Although I am an introvert and an empath I feel like I can easily begin conversations with others but I really long for the deep discussions that go beyond the material world most of us are wrapped up in. Just curious if other empaths feel similar ?
I do in fact feel the exact same way. Making small talk and or participating in narrow minded, materialistic, pop culture induced conversations can never hold my attention and I become bored and agitated internally. My brain always trails off and I become lost inside my head, thinking the same judgemental conversation on how sad society has become and when will they ever wake up, how can I save this person, how can I open their eyes. Then I study their expressions and movements, attire, body demeanor, searching for some way to connect, and if I can’t, I make up an excuse to disengage. I’ve found that the older I get, the less I want to waste my breath on those that don’t understand and can’t see the bigger picture. It’s when I find those that think and feel on a higher, non self centered level, that I become captivated.
I found this article very touching, thanks for writing.
You’re very welcome. 🙂
Thank you Diane. I feel like a kid in some respects. How far along you led me these past few years. You are das beste
Aww, thanks Ben. 🙂 🙂 🙂
THIS is the answer to the inner turmoil I have been feeling and questioning lately. Thank you so much for your clarity and bringing understanding to this soul. Light and love.
You’re very welcome, Carolyn. 🙂