Have you ever spent time with someone who on the surface seems as nice as pie, but when with them you feel awful and struggle to form a sentence?
This discomfort is caused by your Empathic antenna sensing all is not what it seems. You are detecting that what this person is showing is a fake persona created to hide something from others.
When an Empath comes across fake people it is common for them to shut down as a form of protection. This can be seen as stumbling over words or one’s memory and thought process being affected. Anyone who is not emanating truthful vibes will put an Empath on high alert.
In my days as a hairdresser, I could never understand why when with certain clients, who came across lovely, I would experience awful feelings inside. It was only when I discovered I was an Empath that it all made sense to me. I was still feeling their pain, even though they were trying to hide it in fake pleasantries.
There are many levels of fakeness and many reasons for it. In the early days of discovering one’s Empathic abilities it may not always be easy to pinpoint just why someone feels so bad to you.
Here are some behaviours that may leave you in ‘freeze mode’:
- Someone who wants to loved by everyone, acting overly nice to get adoration.
- Someone who is filled with hate or anger yet working to convince the world otherwise.
- Someone who had an emotionally destructive childhood, leaving them insecure and in pain, playing the tough guy.
- Someone who has built a new personality to hide the person they believe will not be accepted by society.
- Someone being full of insincere praise.
- Someone making up stories to make themselves sound interesting
And this is how you may find yourself reacting:
- Avoiding being in said person’s presence, yet not really having a reason to do so (as in they did not say or do anything to hurt you).
- Not being able to talk to said person. Sentences literally won’t form in your mouth and your brain acts like you have no memory. You find yourself just asking questions and when you do talk, it feels like it makes no sense.
- Experiencing sensations of dread in the pit of stomach that won’t go until you are no longer in said person’s presence.
- Any more than an hour spent in said person’s company drains you or leaves you feeling ill.
- Having a sense of guilt. You like said person but dislike how it feels to be with them.
- Feeling helpless around said person.
When an Empath freezes around inauthenticity, it is just has to be accepted as part and parcel of Empath life and something they come to learn to live with. However, there might be another reason for this reaction:
Just because an Empath feels fakery and untruths in another, does not mean they do not fake themselves. For some, when they feel bad around a faker it may mean they are picking up a trait they do not like about themselves and they too hide from the world.
If this is the case, until you face your truth, you will always be adversely affected when in the face of inauthenticity.
We all put on a face and act fake at some point in our lives. We may act upbeat and happy when we feel sad or depressed, we may play annoyed when we are actually indifferent or we may have to pretend to love a job we actually detest. In some cases, faking it can get us through difficult situations. But living it daily is not healthy.
For this reason, it is important for the Empath to uncover any hidden traits and stored painful emotions, because whilst we bury a side of us we do not like we will never be happy or feel complete. The problem, however, is that many of us do not know the root cause of our inner-pains.
One of the biggest causes of unhappiness on this planet is people not knowing themselves. When we hide a side of ourselves from others, without knowing the reason, it causes pain.
Sensitive people bury negative traits because we know how destructive they are, but burying them does not lose them. They still affect life in the most destructive ways.
Hate, anger, jealousy and fear of rejection are four traits most often buried.
We may hate someone for the way they have behaved towards us. Anger may have been inherited from an angry parent. Praise and attention being bestowed on a childhood friend or sibling may have led to a jealous streak, and being rejected as a child, by an unknowing parent, may have built up inside as an intense fear of rejection. All very simple and innocent triggers, but all of which can snowball and lead us to have deep-set insecurities that we feel have to remain hidden.
There is also the fact to consider that many of the traits we bury have in fact been inherited and passed down the family line or they may even stem from a past life. Wherever they originated, it is important to uncover buried fears and true personality traits, and if they can’t be changed (some traits are hard-wired), accept and learn to live with them.
Being true and authentic is emotionally freeing. Once we recognize and accept any negative traits we have buried, they tend to lose their hold.
Hope this helps on your journey.
Until next time.
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©Diane Kathrine at Empaths Empowered
This article can also be seen on AwakeningPeople.Com
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